Posts made by USHorizon

I'll check it out.

You may have to consider how you learned to consider what is or what is not attractive. That's what the author may be getting at in this article. I know it's odd, but race function as symbolism. And the tricky thing about is symbolism is that it's culturally learned to associate the symbol with a meaning. There's all sorts of phobias (like negrophobia for one) that are built into societies. Franz Fanon's "Black Skin, White Masks" is a great study by a psychologist that leans in deep to the nature of negrophobia.  For a fictional account of the phobia against Japanese people, I'd recommend When the Emperor Was Divine by Julie Otsuka.

@vaylon:

This is stupid.
Just because you don't find someone personally attractive makes you a racist?

I am very very multiracial. Got a little bit of every corner of the globe in me. But I am picky about who I sleep with.
But when it comes to being friends? Then I am color blind completely.

All people have preferences and races is one of those larger categories that people are just placed in.

People need to quit looking for racism where there isn't any.

Hey 90's kid, your color blindness is actually a problem, too.  And it's a problem that didn't start in the 90's. I can think of seeing it in the 1890's in William Dean Howell's introduction to Paul Laurence Dunbar's "Lyrics to a Lowly Life".

–from another 90's kid

@scartoonstar:

I know this is a very cliche opening statement but I don't see color. I don't categorize people that do as "bad people" either because let's be real… some people just weren't raised right, and the beliefs instilled within you as a child more than often tend to follow you into adulthood. I just choose not to surround myself with those types of people. I was a 90's kid and we were basically spearheading the generations of "unlimited love." I am attracted to men from all ethnic backgrounds. The tone of someone's skin shouldn't define whether or not they are good looking or their character as a person. If you're not into someone you should let them down easy saying "Sorry you're not my type, but new friends are welcomed." Otherwise you end up making a fool of yourself when it comes to online dating. Don't be that guy, no one likes him. /End rant

@Thomasride:

If someone says "No blacks, no Asians. Not racist, just my preference", fuck them and don't waste your time.

There are so many many gay men (white, black, asian…), you just need one to choose you and whom you choose.

Wow!!!!–you make dating sound like an act of freedom, as if you live in a capitalist society where love is just a market choice that everyone can freely participate in.  Note the sarcasm.

All f*cks aside, I truly understand your point, but I also truly think it ignores the racial privilege that the author of the advocate article may not access as an person of color. Speaking in metaphor and as a person of color, when everyone rushes to the ice cream store to buy vanilla, because they've been conditioned to think vanilla is the only flavor they want, that leaves chocolate, strawberry, etc. feeling less desired.

There's no such thing as anti-white racism. I have a sneaking suspicion you're not going to understand nor like that fact; although, you'll probably just consider it an opinion or a claim. But when racism is a concept created to both divide people into a group in order to receive or deny them privilege, where white people receive the most privilege.  Just some critical race 101 for you.

Your reaction to this may be just your (white) fragility. I don't think you'll like that either, but I'm hoping the trauma sticks with you and you start hearing or recognizing the term more often. Let the healing begin.  :afr:

@raphjd:

These threads always scream of anti-white racism.

In another thread, I showed that ALL races have similar levels of preference to their own race.   I was reported for being racist simply for showing that no race was better or worse than any other in this regard.  That's the problem, I'm "evil" for showing stats on racial preferences by race in dating/relationships which shows "demons" of the earth.

Yes, or more broadly, it may mean you hold a bias or prejudice. Racism has more to do with power.
Also, racism doesn't have to be intentional. Racism can also be internalized. Racism can also be institutional. The effects of racism, however, are real, whether intended or not.

People will keep looking for racism as long as it exists. You may not like it, but those who feel the effects of racism don't like it either.

@vaylon:

This is stupid.
Just because you don't find someone personally attractive makes you a racist?

I am very very multiracial. Got a little bit of every corner of the globe in me. But I am picky about who I sleep with.
But when it comes to being friends? Then I am color blind completely.

All people have preferences and races is one of those larger categories that people are just placed in.

People need to quit looking for racism where there isn't any.

@gaston:

My mantra, "There's nothing sexier than clean sheets!"

For casual sex, always clean sheets.

Agreed

No, but dated someone who was technically homeless. Technically because she was living with a friend's mom. Her situation got desperate after a few months when the friend's mom had to move out for renovations. Then she started transitioning. It was a lot.

You're asking on a gay porn website's forum. I feel like the results may be a bit skewed.

@Gianni89:

One way attractions never work out well, forget him, delete his info so you aren't tempted to even try because trust you are only going to hate yourself later. Find a new tutor, pay for this one, at least you won't get sidetracked. Never make anyone a priority in your life when you remain a mere option in theirs. Jesus, I'm Ann Landers. :afr:

I agree with Ann Landers.

Both. Hairy twink asses are really nice tbh.

Loud but not porn fake loud.

I like the aesthetic of smoking; I don't like ashtray mouth.

I hate lazy managers a little bit more. But hey–who actually enjoys working?

Well, there's definitely a problem with giving consent while drunk. And if you don't know how many drinks that person had nor know that person, then they could definitely exhibit behavior that's outside their normal sober interactions. So it can be an incredibly difficult situation. Be careful.

@harry3500:

Openly or closeted? I guess you wouldn't know if someone was closeted in your family.

I'm out. Took a while. On my mom's side, I also have two queer female cousins. One is more out and open than the other and one older gay cousin who isn't out. He's from an older generation, so I don't think he'll ever come out. But if he did, no one would be surprised.

Make your own family. I know there's social protocol that claims we must tolerate our blood relatives, but not every culture demands that. You can make alternate families or kinship circles with supportive people to supplement your family.

Or find people who won't treat you differently, if that's possible.

Are you attracted to your best friend, as well?

Which behaviors are you specifically referring to?