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    Posts made by coryzinho

    • Mother

      A mother is in the kitchen making dinner for her family when her daughter walks in. “Mother, where do babies come from?” The mother thinks for a few seconds and says, “Well dear, Mommy and Daddy fall in love and get married. One night they go into their bedroom, they kiss and hug, and have sex.” The daughter looks puzzled so the mother continues, “That means the daddy puts his penis in the mommy’s vagina. That’s how you get a baby, honey.” The child seems to comprehend. “Oh, I see, but the other night when I came into your room you had daddy’s penis in your mouth. What do you get when you do that?” “Jewelry, my dear. Jewelry.”

      posted in Jokes & Funny Stuff
      C
      coryzinho
    • Teacher

      A teacher is teaching a class and she sees that Johnny isn't paying attention, so she asks him, "If there are three ducks sitting on a fence, and you shoot one, how many are left?" Johnny says, "None." The teacher asks, "Why?" Johnny says, "Because the shot scared them all off." The teacher says, "No, two, but I like how you're thinking." Johnny asks the teacher, "If you see three women walking out of an ice cream parlor, one is licking her ice cream, one is sucking her ice cream, and one is biting her ice cream, which one is married?" The teacher says, "The one sucking her ice cream." Johnny says, "No, the one with the wedding ring, but I like how you're thinking!"

      posted in Jokes & Funny Stuff
      C
      coryzinho
    • Jimmy

      The teacher asked Jimmy, "Why is your cat at school today Jimmy?" Jimmy replied crying, "Because I heard my daddy tell my mommy, 'I am going to eat that p*ssy once Jimmy leaves for school today!'"

      posted in Jokes & Funny Stuff
      C
      coryzinho
    • husband and wife

      A husband and wife are trying to set up a new password for their computer. The husband puts, "Mypenis," and the wife falls on the ground laughing because on the screen it says, "Error. Not long enough."

      posted in Jokes & Funny Stuff
      C
      coryzinho
    • Q: What are a pedophile's favorite shoes?

      A: White Vans.

      posted in Jokes & Funny Stuff
      C
      coryzinho
    • Knock, knock.

      Knock, knock.
      Who's there?
      Daisy.
      Daisy who?
      Daisy me rollin', they hatin'.

      posted in Jokes & Funny Stuff
      C
      coryzinho
    • Q: How do you make holy water?

      A: Boil the hell out of it.

      posted in Jokes & Funny Stuff
      C
      coryzinho
    • Why did the hipster burn his mouth?

      Because he ate his pizza before it was cool.

      posted in Jokes & Funny Stuff
      C
      coryzinho
    • Q: How do you get a blond on the roof?

      A: You tell her the food is on the house.

      posted in Jokes & Funny Stuff
      C
      coryzinho
    • What do you call a piece of cheese that isn't yours?

      A: Nacho cheese.

      posted in Jokes & Funny Stuff
      C
      coryzinho
    • Two Eskimos

      Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly, so they lit a fire in the craft. Unsurprisingly it sank, proving once again that you can't have your kayak and heat it too.

      posted in Jokes & Funny Stuff
      C
      coryzinho
    • Q: Why did the duck go to jail?

      A: Because he got caught selling quack.

      posted in Jokes & Funny Stuff
      C
      coryzinho
    • Q: What did one hat say to another?

      A: You stay here, I’ll go on a head.

      posted in Jokes & Funny Stuff
      C
      coryzinho
    • Q: What is crazy and walks along the sides of buildings?

      A: A walnut.

      posted in Jokes & Funny Stuff
      C
      coryzinho
    • Why is gambling illegal in Africa?

      Because there are too many cheetahs!

      posted in Jokes & Funny Stuff
      C
      coryzinho
    • My wife and I

      My wife and I are planning our 21st wedding anniversary celebration. Here lies the problem: she wants to go to Outback Steakhouse, I want sex, and my mother-in-law thinks we should renew our vows at church. Well, I'm all for compromise, so we should have sex outback of the church.

      posted in Jokes & Funny Stuff
      C
      coryzinho
    • Yo mamma..

      Yo mamma is so fat that when she sat on a laptop, the hardware turned into software!

      posted in Jokes & Funny Stuff
      C
      coryzinho
    • Q: What do you call a duck that steals?

      A: A Robber Duck.

      posted in Jokes & Funny Stuff
      C
      coryzinho
    • Teacher and student

      Teacher: "Where was the Constitution of India signed?"
      Student: "At the bottom of the page!"

      posted in Jokes & Funny Stuff
      C
      coryzinho
    • Snake crossing a highway

      There was a snake crossing a highway and a truck ran over its ass. The snake went back to get its ass and a truck ran over its head. The moral of the story is, "Don't lose your head over a piece of ass."

      posted in Jokes & Funny Stuff
      C
      coryzinho
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