I use to be the same way.. HATED going out HATED most people … disguised by the gay community and its standards for beauty and attractivness.. I hated myself really is what it was... had a boyfriend for the frist time it didnt go well, ended up not wanting to be around him.. and resenting him for wasting my time.. lol - but i REALLY didnt love myself.. after college I made it a goal to find things about my personality, body, desires, interests that i rly liked.. even if it felt like i was lying to myself i did it anyway.. and kind of thought of it as "these are things i would like to love about myself" and just be honest with yourself, dont compare yourself to people. everyones different and have different journies. Also everyones attractive to SOMEBODY, and everyones deserving of love and acceptance, if not from other people atleast from yourself :hug2: :hug2: :hug2: :hug2: :love:
hope this helps a little !