Why do many gay men seem to be clones ?
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So what I am asking is, why so many gay men always have to look alike, dress alike, etc. It seems that a large aspect of the gay community is about individuality. If this is the case, how come some gay men are turned off if you have long hair, like hard rock music, don't care about gay bars. Can't do anything they deem as "straight" ? Being gay does not define who I am, it is only one particular aspect of my life. Some guys all have to wear the same designer clothes and only be seen at the same gay bar. What's wrong with a regular bar ? What is wrong with sports, but at the same time enjoying musicals, and crafting, and heavy metal music, and uninhibited sex behind a building, lol ? Guys where I live anyway are in their gay world. When you speak of something outside their little circle they act like it does not exist. Or, anything you say always comes back to have a sexual innuendo involved. Tell me your thoughts. I live life doing what I like, not doing what I think others want to see my as so we can hook-up or anything else. And don't get me started on those lesbians…LOL
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My partner and I are what you could term "Gap guys". Basically we dress in casual but smart clothes, unless it's something like a black tie event which is rare for us.
I love gay bars {though we don't go out much anymore}, but I can't stand the trendy gay bars. Living in Aberdeen Scotland, there isn't a real gay scene, just a few places that are gay friendly, sorta. This isn't a problem for us because were aren't flamers or the like.
Being a dual national {US & UK} and someone who has traveled the world, I have seen the people you are talking about and they make me sick to be around.
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I live in Fort Lauderdale, Florida which has an area called Wilton Manors which is most definitely a very large gay area. A good majority of guys that live in this area tend to never travel outside of it. I live about 10-15 minutes from there. So, god forbid if I want some company some night and want someone to come over they act like I live across the ocean. By that time I usually just tell I will call Delta and get a ticket ready for them, and end the conversation. And the guys that define themselves as A & F, etc..Why would you have to use a type of clothing to describe yourself ? I have long hair, tats, earrings, wear ripped jeans, Doc Martens, etc. Guys see that and get freaked out. Oh, but let them see my profile on Manhunt and it's the same guys that send me message after message wanting ass….Go figure. This is why I claim to be mostly gay just for the sex. No other aspect of being gay tends to thrill me anymore.
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Going to gaybar help you to avoid being beaten up by straight guys if your gaydar just works wrongly. Many straight guys seem like to beat the gay guy if he tries to hook him up.
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Because people find a niche and they feel they need to conform to the "standards" and "pratices" of that niche. Same thing goes on in the emo/posthardcore community and it has gone to shit because of it.
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Thats just one type of gay person, and to be honest they are more than entitled to be like that. The main problem is that these are the guys who are most easily recognised as being gay, you don't see the gay guys who are in straight bars, it doesn't mean that they aren't there!
Now don't get me wrong, I love going out on the scene and I am capable of being on of those guys that dresses and acts like everyone else, hell its a lot of fun. That isn't the whole me though, I am always in straight bars too and straight clubs, and I don't stand out. I do martial arts and I have my own "non-gay" interests.
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It is the psychology of the human brain to try and 'fit' in. No matter how hard everyone tries, not to fit in. If you think about it, everyone fits some stereotype or group. It's too bad that the media only focuses on those gay men who are flamboyant and well dressed, it doesn't really reflect the reality of the gay population. I guess that's why we have all been through that one phase in our lives when we keep wondering if a guy is "straight" or "gay".lol! If they were all the same, we wouldn't have that problem, would we?
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This doesn't really bother me. It is a style they are into. I listen to industrial music and very rarely hear a pop song I can get into, that being said, I have no qualms about going to "cliche" gay bars because I'm an open minded person. Most of the guys I meet tend to be pretty open minded but enjoy the style they're in.
I also live just outside of NYC, which has a pretty large gay community, so I may be a bit spoiled here.
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ino wot u mean i live in manchester uk, and most of the gay guys seem to fit into this clone of bitchiness, going gay bars, etc, and it is hard to find a gay guy who is after a bit more then that here, esp ones who wanna have a decent convo, though wild sex is good too ;D but i find to that its a very ethnic exclusive thing to cos im not white im a mix of pakistani kenyan indian and british and its hard to make friends and meet guys with a lot of gay guys here who just dont seem to be interested
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I never had issues with fiting in…and as much as a group tries to be the same they are not...
but honestly what is it really that bothers you guys? the fact that they find their place? or the fact that they are the obvious gays, as someone said, or what?
I have the tattos the piercings..and the crazy hair...and i go to any bar, mostly gay, and club...even if ti looks like i do not fit in..cause i do not care...and i always get enough attention..LOL
some of us need to feed in..our society pushes us out to quickly...so some may over do it...but can you blame them...don't be to quick to judge...
I'm a half sport fan..but its not like i want to be talking about that all the time..and get so crazy like some fans can be...
just chill dudes..and live and let live...
and like i said i had some haristyle..and will keep at it until if falls off..LMAO
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I love your sig. 4chan post some crazy ass ones by the same animator every now and then.
Anyway, to the TC, it must be where you live. I hardly ever see "gay" gays who look gay gay. I go to str8 bars more than gay bars. I dont know how old you are, but you shouldnt feel the need to fit in. Its important to find yourself and your own style.
But I do know what you mean by the gay clone thing. Its kinda annyoing. Thats why I go after guys who are hot, but dont need to shop at A&F or something to prove so. -
i just think that they're clones because this stereotype of gay guys are portrayed easily by television and other media sources. the closeted ones aren't that obvious, hmm wonder why. lol
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i just think that they're clones because this stereotype of gay guys are portrayed easily by television and other media sources. the closeted ones aren't that obvious, hmm wonder why. lol
Because people are really narrow minded, that they have a hard time cooping with people who prefer to cuddle with Aslan.
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well it's true, but it's getting less so.
IN the begining it was:
a form of creative identity
a form of uniform - a signal - a deliniationThen it moved to:
a form of catagorising sexual recreationNow days i dont think gays are so hung up on these clone looks.
If you look at population in general - people do tend to ware the same kind of clothes when they hang out together - but it's not so much about cloning now days - just the sameness that comes with the way we shop and what we are conditioned to wear.Personally i never did enjoy that uniform - clone thing - but whatever we wear - it is always some kind of code which says i am this sort of person - so it's hard to escape it. Better just to be content with one's own choices, with the odd diversification every now and then…....
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If you look at population in general - people do tend to ware the same kind of clothes when they hang out together - but it's not so much about cloning now days - just the sameness that comes with the way we shop and what we are conditioned to wear.
I agree! And this bothers me in Poland. The whole LGBT, pride, coming-outs, new-life style stuff have just started to develop. A few years ago when boy was wearing a pink shirt, it was nearly 100% he's gay. Nowadays "looking gay" is a trendy pose, it's hard to recognize gay from metrosexuals or even hetero … (Or my gaydar is so lame now facepalm ). You may think it's normal, but this is Poland - the post-communist shithole that is really trying to keep up with the west European countries. Still a lot of things to change but thankfully there really is a progress.
But the most annoying pose for me is... normality. A lot of my friends try to be as normal as they can in both behaviour and look. And to quote Oscar Wilde: "Being natural is simply a pose, and the most irritating pose I know."
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**Hhmmmm. It sounds as if you have not been subjected to the variety of lifestyles that gays actually lead.
Not all are the same. I agree with the whole clone thing to a degree. It kind of angers me as well, most of all the shallow-ness and shady reliability or lack thereof.**
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Not all are the same.
i dare to say , most are .
Example :
When Halston Z12 appeared on the market , shortly afterwards almost every gay had Halston .
Calvin Klein : when those baggy jeans and street-wear were in and it was common to show part of your underwear , gays crowded shoping-places in order to catch the latest CK slip .
Nipples-percing: once it started , gays had to imitate
the list could go on and on : no matter if it is a special and new hair-cut , jeans , rings , bodybuilding -
Not all are the same.
i dare to say , most are .
Example :
When Halston Z12 appeared on the market , shortly afterwards almost every gay had Halston .
Calvin Klein : when those baggy jeans and street-wear were in and it was common to show part of your underwear , gays crowded shoping-places in order to catch the latest CK slip .
Nipples-percing: once it started , gays had to imitate
the list could go on and on : no matter if it is a special and new hair-cut , jeans , rings , bodybuildingEh, False. All you mentioned are called FADS and types.
Statistics show that amazingly enough Gay guys between 15-30 purchase as much in the retail vertical as women.
For the record, I hated Halston. It smelled too damn str8. Elw.
I have never shown my underwear under my jeans(or above)- and if I did it wasn't on purpose! (Well, if there was a cute boy around perhaps- but just to see if he'd look!) These are called SAGGERS. There are still saggers today, and it is not a gay following thing, either. I think its maybe more of a skater thing even.Body-building? New Hair-Cuts? Hello, a majority of gay guys have always tried to look good! If there is anything a majority of gay guys are its shallow and self-centered, and perhaps this is something that is constant or "The same". This surely needs to change- that would be a miracle. Mullets were popular in the 70s. To not be the same, should one have a mullet?
Piercings? I do not know too many who ran out and did it because of this or that, other than either a its A a F A D. Or B, they wanted it. (or in some cases, someone else wanted them to have it and they were stupid enough to adhere)
I wonder about your sense of fashion, fads, trends, or interests, or lack thereof. The guy who started this post likes rock music etc. He could be the "Same" as some guys in a certain area, therefore making him a clone of his kind. He just hasn't found them. We are attracted to those that are like us, it is nature.
I'd love to see this list, lol. Who wears Halston now?
Calvin Klein has always been a fan of mine due to SOME of the underwear manufactured. I could list underwear most have never even heard of, am I the "Same", or a clone?
There are plenty of different kinds of guys out there with the exception of the aforementioned in my previous post. I am not sure part of the earth you are in. Stop reading one magazine. In my section of the world, it is very gay- and there are MANY MANY MANY different types.
Don't get me wrong, your opinion is your opinion after all. Like assholes, everyone has one.
If you look at population in general - people do tend to ware the same kind of clothes when they hang out together - but it's not so much about cloning now days - just the sameness that comes with the way we shop and what we are conditioned to wear.
I agree! And this bothers me in Poland. The whole LGBT, pride, coming-outs, new-life style stuff have just started to develop. A few years ago when boy was wearing a pink shirt, it was nearly 100% he's gay. Nowadays "looking gay" is a trendy pose, it's hard to recognize gay from metrosexuals or even hetero … (Or my gaydar is so lame now facepalm ). You may think it's normal, but this is Poland - the post-communist shithole that is really trying to keep up with the west European countries. Still a lot of things to change but thankfully there really is a progress.
But the most annoying pose for me is... normality. A lot of my friends try to be as normal as they can in both behaviour and look. And to quote Oscar Wilde: "Being natural is simply a pose, and the most irritating pose I know."
You are who and what you hang with. I have not seen a mix of 10 different "Types" since High school- and I was friends with ALL of them, marking MY individuality. It is not the "Norm" to have 20 friends all with different tastes in EVERYTHING. and by that definition, I am not the norm because I do.
Sure I'm preppy, and I like fashionable underwear and to look good- but because I like the products, not because of the ad or "Everyone else is doing it". Actually "Jumping on the bandwagon" is a marketing strategy, and a very good one. There are guys out there that are not the same. Period.
Look at all of you- clones of one another? perhaps because we all like gay porn we are?
Who knows, why am I even saying all this- fashion does start in Europe after all- the rest of us seem to follow.
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Who knows, why am I even saying all this- fashion does start in Europe after all- the rest of us seem to follow.
Only Europeans think that.
Quite a bit of fashion starts in the US.
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Who knows, why am I even saying all this- fashion does start in Europe after all- the rest of us seem to follow.
Only Europeans think that.
Quite a bit of fashion starts in the US.
I'm not European. How is this so? I have always seen it start in Europe, then go to the west coast, then move east in the US. All my life. I have worked in quite a fair share of retail.
Why do the top fashion shows, and most fashion industries/designers come from Europe?
Where is the Authority on this? lol