Should You Discuss Your Sexual History with your fuck date, date, b/f? When?
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Remember way, way, way back in high school sex ed class when your teacher warned that when you have sex with someone, you’re having sex with everyone they’ve ever had sex with? As disgusting as it sounded back then, the truth is, they were right. “You need to know a person’s sexual history upfront – diseases, genders of partners, and testing history,” so one line of thinking goes.
Do you agree?
When do you tell people about your sexual history?
Do you tell the guy you invited over from Grinder? Do you tell the guy you're dating on the first date, tenth date, never?
Since these forums reach people all over the planet, I'm curious as to how people approach this.
Me? I don't say anything unless I'm asked. ;D
(Except about HIV. I do ask about HIV and am very clear that I'm not HIV positive.) -
**Although your sexual history doesn’t define you, it definitely contributes to the person you are today..
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**Although your sexual history doesn’t define you, it definitely contributes to the person you are today..
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And who might you be? ;D
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My opinion: the past is the past. Your lover doesn't owe you blackmail material. You don't owe your lover a litany of bad choices you've made. Whether in the number of lover or 70s hair styles or the time you thought about joining a cult.
You do owe a person you love the present where you don't compare them to nostalgia about previous partners, whether good or bad.Health issues are a matter of the present not the past. If you want to have a serious relationship you have to take the risk of being rejected over HIV status or disabilities. One of my disasterous relationships involved finding out AFTER I was in a committed relationship that my boyfriend was bipolar. It got more stressful until I left - I found out that the last 2 years out of 6 he had decided to go off the meds that made him function.
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My opinion: the past is the past. Your lover doesn't owe you blackmail material. You don't owe your lover a litany of bad choices you've made. Whether in the number of lover or 70s hair styles or the time you thought about joining a cult.
You do owe a person you love the present where you don't compare them to nostalgia about previous partners, whether good or bad.Health issues are a matter of the present not the past. If you want to have a serious relationship you have to take the risk of being rejected over HIV status or disabilities. One of my disasterous relationships involved finding out AFTER I was in a committed relationship that my boyfriend was bipolar. It got more stressful until I left - I found out that the last 2 years out of 6 he had decided to go off the meds that made him function.
More than 5 million people in the United States have bipolar disorder..
People with bipolar disorder typically have mood swings that range from highs called mania, to lows called depression.
Unless you have severe mania, bipolar disorder can be difficult to diagnose!
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Hmmm… definitely not the whole history.
I don't do hook ups , just dates. So it's easier. I get to know a person and see when they are lying or not.
I also try to do condom sex (which I hate) and even then I almost always ask.
But it's always such a weird moment. I don't talk about it until I know something happens for sure, cause why would I ask if something won't happen, but when it comes to the penetration well that's when I just have to ask and it's so hard because it ruins the mood, but we never ended an intercourse after that question. I have to admit I had few bareback sex without asking before. And that was stupid. But I was fine after all. One guy actually told me when we had sex and when I was about to fuck him that he is positive. We actually became friends later. He took his meds and stuff and I knew details of his health status. He visited his doctor every 3 months to check if the virus is under control so it was ok.
Right now my position is - I just stay careful. I don't ask anymore I guess but as well I try to not suck dick of the other person I definitely don't swallow and just try to watch out for if I have small cuts or have my blood exposed or something. The most dangerous thing is when I actually don't want to have sex but I'm riding my dick up and down someone's crack. Sometimes I don't even know when it slips in. Of course nothing happens when you just stick your dick for 2 seconds in someone's ass but it's just so tempting to go on. -
Hmmm… definitely not the whole history.
I don't do hook ups , just dates. So it's easier. I get to know a person and see when they are lying or not.
I also try to do condom sex (which I hate) and even then I almost always ask.
But it's always such a weird moment. I don't talk about it until I know something happens for sure, cause why would I ask if something won't happen, but when it comes to the penetration well that's when I just have to ask and it's so hard because it ruins the mood, but we never ended an intercourse after that question. I have to admit I had few bareback sex without asking before. And that was stupid. But I was fine after all. One guy actually told me when we had sex and when I was about to fuck him that he is positive. We actually became friends later. He took his meds and stuff and I knew details of his health status. He visited his doctor every 3 months to check if the virus is under control so it was ok.
Right now my position is - I just stay careful. I don't ask anymore I guess but as well I try to not suck dick of the other person I definitely don't swallow and just try to watch out for if I have small cuts or have my blood exposed or something. The most dangerous thing is when I actually don't want to have sex but I'm riding my dick up and down someone's crack. Sometimes I don't even know when it slips in. Of course nothing happens when you just stick your dick for 2 seconds in someone's ass but it's just so tempting to go on.Tempting..