Posts made by leatherbear

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We used Crawler to make a slide show out of these pics and use it as our screensaver!!!! Any slide show program will work

At the end of a long crime fighting day, Superman decides he needs to relax for a few hours, so he rings spiderman to see if he'd like to go out for a drink.

Spiderman replies "No, I have to repair my web spinner."

So, Superman rings a few more of his super hero friends and they're all busy. He decides in the end to go for a quick super-fly around the world to clear his mind before bed time.

As he passes over Wonder-Woman's mansion he sees her lying naked and spread eagle next to her pool.

Hmmm he thinks, with my super powers I'll fly down for a quickie and before she realizes I'll be gone.

So he swoops down and "WHAM BAM thank you maam" and he's gone.

Wonder- Woman shreiks "What was that?"

And the invisible man cries "I don't know, but I've sure got a sore ass!!!"

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some more….

A young man was a prostitute and for obvious reasons, didn't want his grandfather to know. One day, the police raided a brothel and arrested a group of prostitutes, including the young man.

The police had the all the prostitutes line up in a straight line on the sidewalk, just as grandpa was passing by. As soon as he noticed his  grandson, he stopped and asked him what he was lining up for.

Not wanting his grandfather to know the truth, the grandson told grandpa that someone was passing out free oranges and he was lining up for some.

"That sounds good. I think I'll have some too," Grandpa said, as he made his way to the back of the line.

A policeman went down the line, questioning all the prostitutes, until he reached grandpa. Looking very bewildered, he said to him, "You're so old, how do you do it?"

"It's easy," replied Grandpa. "I just remove my dentures and suck them dry!"

A man walks into his accountant's office and tells him that he needs to file his taxes.

The accountant says, "Before we begin, I'll need to ask a few questions."

He gets his name, address, social security number, etc. and then asks, "What is your occupation?"

The man replies, "I'm a whore."

The accountant balks and says, "No, no, no. That will never work. That is much too crass. Let's try to rephrase that."

"Ok, I'm a prostitute."

"No, that is still too crude. Try again."

They both think for a minute, then the man says, "I'm a chicken farmer."

The accountant asks, "What does chicken farming have to do with being a whore or a prostitute?"

"Well, I raised over 5,000 cocks last year.

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PART 3: Meeting Leathermen

You don't buy the gear to spend time with it alone at home. You need to connect with other like-minded men to unlock the power of your new fetish.
So where do you go? How do you find them? Are you even ready for it?

Before we get to "Where.". let's take a quick look at "you" first.
Do you know where you are sexually? – Top, Bottom, Versatile?
Well, you're starting a new fetish and you're looking for experience. For the majority, it means you'll have to start on the bottom, and get training from an experienced Top. (It doesn't mean everyone will do this, but it's probably the best way.)

You need some patience here. Not every Top likes leather virgins. They don't want to be put in the role of "teacher." And then again, some love breaking in fresh meat. So keep that in mind when you begin your search. It will be most evident when looking for leather on the 'Net.

Most Leathermen look for men in leather (duh, sounds simple, right?.) Well, that means you need to own some! So take my advice from Part One, and buy a pair of chaps. That is usually the key piece of gear that makes you viable to most Leathermen.
(A Harness & Boots will not cut it for most.)

So let's see where we are.. you own the gear, you're horny, and you're looking to meet men with your fetish. What are your best options? Let's take a look.

MEET & GREET

You've already discovered the internet on your own – since you're on it now. But are you using it right? This is a major problem for so many people that it's painful to watch. So let's go over how to make it effective for you.

Netiquette:
Play Fair.
This will be repeated several times below: No Pic / No Profile = No Chance. Headless pics, dick shots, blank profiles -- will get you nowhere. If you are attracted to someone's pic/profile, why shouldn't they expect the same option from you? (Almost sounds like common sense, doesn't it?) So forget the excuses -- and have a face pic available.

Your Screenname/Profile.
On most services (like AOL, Yahoo, etc.) you have the option to create multiple screennames and profiles. Your "sex" screenname/email address should not be the same one you give to Mommy! Keep it separate. The screenname can be tame or provocative. However, your profile should be detailed and explicit. You need to make it clear what you're looking for.
I, personally, will not respond to non-kink profiles. If you have no profile at all, you get no response at all. When you find a profile you're attracted to -- The other person expects the same from you! You shouldn't make other people play 20 Questions to figure you out.. because most people will not be bothered to do so.
Be creative with your profile, but don't put in stupid shit like song lyrics, your love of Barbra, or lame quotes from "Auntie Mame" -- Be a man, not a queen. And please avoid cheesy cliches like "mild to wild." -- That is such a turn-off line to real Leathermen.
Don't use a city in your name, unless you know you'll never move
(i.e. "glovdcopSF" makes everyone think I'm still in SF.)
Be careful with abbreviations. Some don't make sense, some just look bad (i.e. using "STD" instead of "STUD")
By the way - if you don't have the goods to pull off "Stud" or "Hunk" or "God" etc., don't use it in your screenname. You're just setting others up for a letdown, and yourself for a disappointment. Be realistic.
Work with your fetish, your best attributes, a clever play on words -- whatever will make you stand out from the herd.

And don't go overboard listing what you're not into. People search profiles by keywords. You're just attracting the people you don't want. You know how often I search for "leather" and find a great guy.. then realize he's saying "I'm not into leather." Pick and choose your words carefully.

Have A Good Self-Pic.
Posting a picture of yourself with Grandma blowing out birthday candles will not get you laid. Same goes for pics of yourself with your fag hag, sister, babies, cat, etc. So DON'T post those! What is wrong with you??
And while we're on the topic - Stop posting graduation pictures, photos of yourself at a relative's wedding, and limit your vacation photos to 1 or 2 max. C'mon -- really? Does any of that turn you on when you see it other people's profiles? It's nothing but filler material.
You want to put the BEST pic of yourself forward...
-- First impressions are very important. --
So find a good pic. If you're still not digital - scan one in, and use that. Scanners are as cheap as $50, or go do it yourself at Kinko's.
Take a pic with some leather, it will work in your favor -- even just a decent leather jacket helps. You're trying to attract leather fetishists, so give them a reason to be attracted to you, too. If you are shy about showing your face -- don't expect many takers.
Blind dates hold little interest for most men. Yes, there are several reasons not to post your face publicly on the internet. But have a private one available to send. (This is common sense, guys)

And for crying out loud, don't give the finger in your pictures.
It doesn't make you look like a rebel, it makes you look uneducated.

Your picture should represent "you." And what you're looking for in others.

Spelling Counts.
Nobody is above a few typos here and there... but please, avoid basic spelling errors in your profile that give others a bad first impression of you. The most common and painful ones are "Versital" (Versatile), "Definate" (Definite), and "Dominate" (when meaning Dominant.)
Also, when you mean "You Are" -- use "You're" -- not "Your!"
These basic grammar errors makes a lot of smart people look very stupid.

Attitude.
You want to come off as confident, but don't be a nuisance.
Have a decent opening line, make sure to talk for a few minutes before you ask the inevitable "want to trade pics?"
Send your face pic first. Burn someone with a dick shot or headless pic first, and don't expect the conversation to last, or any connection to be made.
If he's not someone you find attractive, well.. be tactful. Most people understand when you just tell them "it's not a match."
If it is a match, you need to work out the details. The longer you delay setting a meeting time, the less likely it is you will connect.
Make it clear what you'd like to get into, and if you are unsure -- ask to talk on the phone or even meet out for a drink first.
(But be a little more smooth with that... don't act like "I'm worried you're a serial killer.")

Real Time vs. Too Far Away.
The one awful thing about the internet... the men you like are always across the ocean or 3000 miles away. Don't let that stop you from trying to start a conversation, but you need to realize the limitations that distance imposes.
If neither of you travels, it's not a likely connection. And conversations have a death point. There's only so far 99% of them can go without the ability to connect.
So don't be a pest! Don't message someone everytime you see him sign on. It is annoying as hell. I have a few dozen people blocked just because they are that freakin' annoying. There's only so many times you can say "Hey what's going on? Not much, and you?"
Be able to realize who are your "internet buddies", your "internet fuck buddies", and your "internet acquaintances" -- the ones you should say hello to periodically.. but don't stalk them.

WHERE TO FIND LEATHERMEN:
• RECON LEATHER: You can get the basic membership for free, or pay to upgrade. It has many sites catering to different fetishes under one umbrella. Heavily European, but Americans have become more dominant on the site.
• MANHUNT.NET: This is a very mixed site, but does have a good amount of leathermen on it; you have to wade through the non-kink, but it's there - I've noticed that there are quite a few leather guys on here that you won't find on the other sites. Basic (but very limited) membership is free, but pay to upgrade. It's worth it.
• BNSKIN.com: This site is still very Euro, but more twisted than most. Definitely worth checking out. Though follow the rules when submitting your "verification photo" very closely.. or the moderator will likely ban you from the site (he's very testy about the specifics.)
• CRAIGSLIST.ORG: They actually have a pretty good M4M section under "Personals." You do have to weed through a lot of headless pics, but it is surprisingly good. Lots of very twisted fucks on there who don't advertise elsewhere.
• AOL: Their chatrooms are still a draw, and thousands of leathermen are there. But it's not the same as it used to be.
(Also the service itself can be difficult when looking for M4M)

There are several more sites to check out on my Links Page.
Also make sure to check the Links Pages on other personal websites of Leathermen. You can spend hours going from one site to another, finding a lot of men you'd want to meet.

LEATHER BARS

This choice really depends on where you are. In many smaller cities, the only ones wearing any leather in the local leather bar.. are the bartenders.
So, assuming you're making your first trip to a leather bar.. What should you do? What do you need to know? Let's go through some of the basics.

Hygiene.
Before you head out, some quick notes:
First - No Cologne!
You're not going clubbing, looking for women or twinks, you're looking for men. So don't wear perfume. Besides, you don't want your gear to smell like cologne.
Second - Clean Out!
This goes for any sexually-related activity.. if you think there's even a slight chance you may have sex, clean out your ass well (with a douche hose if possible.) Most men are not into scat, and there's nothing more disgusting than sticking your cock into someone.. and coming back with a chocolate covered banana. A second fuck date wouldn't be likely.
Keep it clean, pig.

Dress Code.
As the term "Leather Bar" denotes, there is an implied dress code. Not every bar strictly enforces it, but it should be observed. Again, don't be stupid. Don't show up to a leather bar in sneakers or inappropriate shoes. Don't show up in a suit, shorts, or club clothes. You're going to a leather bar, so butch it up.. or stay away.
Assuming this is your first trip, you may not know what to expect. The only thing worse than being under-dressed.. is being over-dressed. You may want to keep it very simple. T-shirt, jeans, boots or black shoes, and a leather jacket or vest. Bring a pair of chaps in a backsack. Check the bag or leave it in your car. If the crowd is "leather" enough, put them on. If the crowd is "leather light," well, hang on to them in case you get lucky.. and put them on later.

Flagging.
This is where novices can fall into trouble. If you don't know the Hanky Code.. don't wear one in your pocket. I have a friend who told me how on an early visit to a bar, he wore a red hanky in his back right pocket. Imagine his surprise when he found out what that meant.
Most people only know the most-used colors: Black=S&M, Grey=Bondage, Red=Fisting, Yellow=Piss. Right indicates Bottom, Left indicates Top.
These locations are also valid for other "flagging" items.. Keys, wallet chains, armbands are signals. Wear them on one side, and people assume you are a bottom or a top from it. So keep that in mind when choosing your accessories. Of course, those who wear two arm bands are either versatile.. or just like to confuse…

Picking Up Men.
At first, sit back, watch the crowd. When you find a man you like, well, a lot of it is instinct. Make eye contact. Be aggressive. Approach people. Start a conversation. See where it goes. If it doesn't seem like the person is interested back, take the hint. Not everyone will say a direct "Fuck off!" to your face. If it seems unlikely after a few minutes, excuse yourself and move on.
When you find Mr. Right Now, you may need to disclose your experience level. Judgement call on your part. Perhaps you can fake it, and see where the night takes you.
Do your best to avoid the nuts, because they do exist. If you bring someone into your home, do not let him tie you up. Never let anyone do that in your home on the first fuck date. It's a safety thing. You may want to take things very slow. Or just keep it to "leathersex."
To avoid looking like a leather virgin, remember -- it's about the gear. So take off your jeans, but put those boots and chaps right back on. You shouldn't have to be told. Take that off, and you're just having vanilla sex. You may also want to pack a small bag of gear/toys to bring with you when you go out. Sometimes it can be handy.

LEATHER EVENTS

Throw 10,000 leathermen into one small section of a city for several days.. and chances are, hijinks will ensue. (In other words, pretty good chance you'll have some leather sex.) This is a great option for people who live in rural areas and want to have a leather-oriented vacation. They do turn into an odd mix of Leathermen, circuit queens, and the confused.. but a good time is to be had.
There are numerous leather events worldwide. So which ones are worth your time? Let's take a closer look at the Big 4 in the USA.

Notable Events:
Folsom Street Fair
San Francisco / Last Sunday of Sept.
The largest leather event in the world. Roughly 10 blocks long, and filled to the brim with lots of leather eye candy. It's so big, that SF embraces it as the tourism gold it is. There are more events to Folsom than just the fair itself. The week prior to it is called Leather Week.. with various events at different SF bars.
Most people tend to arrive around Wednesday and stay for a long weekend of fun. Some stick around to the following weekend for the Castro Street Fair (mostly vanilla, some leather.) Check the official website FolsomStreetFair.com for more information. It also worth checking out the SanFranciscoLeather.com site for events.

Dore Alley Fair (a.k.a. Up Your Alley)
San Francisco / Last Sunday of July
The second major event in SF's leather community. It is a scaled down version of Folsom, in practically the same location.. but only around 5 blocks long. A lot of people actually prefer Dore to Folsom. Much fewer twinks, virgins, and gawkers with babycarriages. It tends to be a more concentrated leather crowd. And is easier to handle overall, compared to Folsom.
The FolsomStreetFair.com site is also the official site for Dore Alley Fair.

IML - International Mr. Leather
Chicago / Memorial Day Weekend
(Last full weekend of May)
This is a different bag than the street fairs. The event itself is concentrated in a hotel, which is taken over by Leathermen. Because of that, this is probably your best choice to get laid in leather. It's much more likely at this event. It is Chicago's largest convention, period. So the rotating host hotels really go out of their way to accomodate the guests.
Spend the money, and stay in the host hotel. You're MUCH better off. You can come and go to your room with ease. Even if you skip the contest, etc., you'll do just fine – most people hang out in the lobby, smoking, drinking, cruising and connecting. Probably about 10,000 men wind up here. Arrive on Wed/Thur, leave on Mon/Tue. A good time is guaranteed.
More information is available on IMrL.com.

MAL - Mid-Atlantic Leather
Washington, DC / Mid-January
Similar to IML, but a little more spread out. If you can, stay at the host hotel again for ease (The Washington Plaza.) If not, there are 4-5 other major hotels right there- all with leather guests staying there. Most people congregate in the lobby at the Plaza, or at the Green Lantern bar (one block away.) I personally get a more hardcore vibe from MAL than IML.. just an East Coast thing. But you have to remember - DC in January is freakin' cold. Good leather weather, but really cold. Snow storms are possible. But then again, you may never leave the hotel.
More information is available on LeatherWeekend.com.

Other Events / Leather Calendar
There are many other events that may be more suited to your needs, your fetishes, your location, etc. Here are just some of the ones I know of.. there are plenty more. Click on links for more details. If you have a good event to add to this list, Let Me Know!

JANUARY

Washington, DC MAL - Mid-Atlantic Leather
Palm Springs Maximus (Cigars & Leather)

FEBRUARY

San Francisco IBR - International Bear Rendezvous
Dallas South Plains Leatherfest

MARCH

Sydney Gay Mardi Gras
Los Angeles Mr. Los Angeles Leather / LA Leather Weekend

APRIL

Las Vegas SmokeOut (Cigars & Leather)
Vancouver, BC RubbOut
Berlin Mr. German Leather (& Easter Party)
Cleveland CLAW Leather Wknd (& Monthly Dungeon Parties)
Palm Springs Palm Springs Pump Weekend (Vac Pump)
Los Angeles Black & Tans Spring Maneuvers

MAY

Chicago IML - International Mr. Leather
Chicago Bear Pride

JUNE

Palm Springs Fist Fest
San Francisco Gay Pride
San Francisco Uniform Ball
New York City Gay Pride
New York City Folsom Street East
Los Angeles Gay Pride
Toronto Gay Pride
Sydney Gay Pride
Atlanta SouthEast LeatherFest

JULY

Toronto Folsom Fair North
Montreal World Out Games (LeatherMen Info)
San Francisco Dore Alley Fair

AUGUST

Russian River (Calif.) Lazy Bear Weekend
Hamburg Hamburg Leather Party
Montreal Montreal Leather Weekend
New Orleans Southern Decadence

SEPTEMBER

San Francisco Hairrison Street Fair
Berlin Folsom Europe
Palm Springs West Coast Rubber Weekend
San Francisco Folsom Street Fair (Leather Week / Mr. SF Leather)
San Francisco B&B Corps "Roll Call" (FSF Wknd)
Provincetown Mates Leather Weekend

OCTOBER

San Francisco Castro Street Fair
Charlotte International Leather Sir & Leather Boy
Palm Springs Palm Springs Pump Weekend (Vac Pump)
Amsterdam Amsterdam Leather Pride
Dallas Smoketoberfest

NOVEMBER

Palm Springs Palm Springs Leather Weekend
Chicago Mr. International Rubber (Rubber BlowOut)

DECEMBER

TBA ( Apparently a Month of Rest & Recuperation )

Thanks again to GlovdCopSF for this Beginners Guide!!! Please send any comments and thanks to him @ hXXp://www.glovdcopsf.com/home.html

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YAKOV MILOVICH

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:cheers: Does a body good!!! :cheers: