Posts made by jazzmale29

You don't need to be in a relationship. I had a partner once that was on several phone sex hook up apps. One day he was in the shower and his cell phone was on the coffee table, his mom was calling so I decided to pick up the phone and talk to her. After the call and as I was putting down the phone…it made a growing sound, I went "what the hell is this?" So I picked up the phone and noticed that it was a sexual message from one of the phone apps. I had no clue he was on them and when I approached him about it he became upset and said he was just looking for friends. I told him if you want friends find another outlet other than sex hook up sites. He respected the relationship and me and decided that what he had at home was good and offered for me to look at his phone at any given time. It was a trust issue for sure for me but it got worked out. If you respect your partner and the relationship don't cam anymore without him there. Shutting it down when he walked in seems "guilty" to me. I don't blame him for being upset. Why don't you jizz with him together, if you are taking time to cam and jerk off with someone else online...to me that is just another form of cheating because you are doing it with someone else and not your partner. :afr:

Thank you for your kind words Brian

And to give some more background on my last long-term of 8 years….I thought the relationship was going well. We both were managers at a major pet store (in 2 different stores)...we were compatible, got along, enjoyed our time together, took wonderful vacations together and then I had a major massive heart attack that required surgery. While I was in the hospital I thought it was quite strange that my partner was not by my side very much. I was in the hospital for 2 weeks and he spent approx. 4 hours with me the whole 2 weeks I was there. I asked him to please be there to see me off to surgery and he did not show up. When I got home from the hospital I asked what was going on and he told me he did not think he loved me anymore. I was like we have been together for 8 years, I just got home from major heart problems and you tell me this? What the fuck? He wanted to stay at the house and live with me until he decided whether he truly loved me or not anymore. After 2 weeks I approached him and asks what he intentions were and he told me he did not know. One day I was going through my medicine cabinet and noticed that all my viagra was gone out of the medicine bottle. After that I asked him to leave. He moved out the next day. I found out 6 months later that he was engaged to another guy. So after the relationship with him and now the "so called relationship" with Lee...I am pretty much done. Any thoughts?

Thank you, I guess I am doing okay. Last night here in hotel, electricity gets turned on tomorrow at my old house, so I will go back tomorrow.
I went today and packed everything up and Lee didn't have much to say to me. With his bedroom door open, he laid on his bed and sighed, flip flopped around, played with his dick in his pants and then proceeded to talk on the phone and joke and laugh with someone trying to make me jealous. It did not work. It took me 8 hours to pack my things and get ready for the movers to come. When I got ready to leave to come back to the hotel, he came out of the bedroom and said "You know I don't hate you" and I really did not know how to answer that…so I said "well that is good to know", I was not going to entertain him or try to engage in a conversation with him. I do have to go back tomorrow to move some things the movers I don't want them to move. When I say I guess I am okay, I am quite worried because although I am gay, I find myself not wanting to live the lifestyle since all this has taken place. I don't understand this at all. Maybe it is I feel at present "all used up". I have had two long-term relationships with men (I am not interested in pussy at all...LOL) 1 relationship lasting 12 years and the other 8. I think this one did me in...not sure. I am tired and exhausted, no sleep, not hungry and not at all interested in men, porn, dating, bars, nothing gay related all of a sudden. Your thoughts and opinions? I am worried that at my age of 54 (in the gay lifestyle that is a grandpa) that I will not ever entertain the thought of growing old with someone although I don't want to be alone. Just plain over it right now.  :cry2:

Lee (the blind guy) was born with one bad eye and at the age of 10 his other eye started going bad and his retina was detached. So he is totally blind. Yes, he can use a cell phone, it is a special cell phone that he commands using voice and double tapping the screen with his finger. He tells the phone what to do and it does it. He has all kinds of apps on his phone like Pandora, etc.

Here in Texas we have a government agency called HUD (Housing Urban Development Association) that subsidizes disabled people and helps them pay rent for low-income individuals, so yes his rent is actually $1080 a month but he only pays $14 out of that. Trust me there is a long waiting list to get on this program here in the Texas.

Still staying in a hotel, today I have to go over there and pack up my things. I hope he doesn't try to start any shit or try to assault me again because I have decided that if he lays a finger on me I am calling the police. Wish me well please, I need it. I don't plan on discussing anything, I am just going to pack my things so the movers can come on Thursday.

I will keep you posted. Thanks again guys!

Why didn't he move in with me? because he was moving from Dallas to Austin and when we met he already had found an apartment and signed a lease and could not get out of the lease. So we decided it would be more financially easier for me to move in with him since he was on section 8 housing and his rent was $14.00 a month. Instead of running 2 households and paying double bills at 2 places. I have not shared all the details about the relationship as it would have been too lengthy of a post.

Okay guys, lets play nice. #1, I was teasing about finding a boyfriend…did you not see the LOL?  :cheesy2: #2, Yes this was all real and is still ongoing today! #3, I put my house on the market after we were together for 3 months and I had a buyer but it fell through. The house will remain for sale, I am have decided instead of living on the streets I would move back there until it sold.  So please understand that you have not walked a mile in my shoes before casting judgement.

Well it all came to a head last night. I found out I was truly being used and abused. 2 days after the breakup Lee started looking for my replacement, which told me all I needed to know. Who the fuck breaks up (if you are truly in love)and starts looking for another partner immediately? He came out of his room last night and said that this gay lifestyle was just all about sex and everyone he talked too today just wanted to hook up and was not interested in being a partner. Remember he is blind so he is using his cell phone and all the damn hookup apps to try to find another partner (victim). When he told me he was upset because he could not find anyone it was clear to me I meant nothing to him and I said that I could not believe that after 2 days he was already looking for someone to take my place. I told him I could see how much I meant to him and I felt he really never loved me.  He became irate, assualted me and told me to get the hell out of his apartment. So at 2AM in the morning I went to a hotel. I am still in the Hotel. I am moving back into my old home that has sat vacant and for sale for the last 9 months. Being on disability here it has been hard for me, I am getting the electricity turned back on on Nov 1. This is my last night in the hotel since I can't really afford it. He has been very mean to me. If you knew what all I did for this man to be treated this way. Let's just put it this way, I have learned a major life lesson (a little late for a 54 year old). Again, Thanks for all your advice and concern. Hugs to all of you.

and funny since the break-up William has not called at all….so what the fuck is up with that? Since everyone was so helpful with your advice...now help me find a good decent man! I am in TX...LOL!  Love you guys!

I just truly wanted to thank all of you for your help and advice. i had no one to talk to about this problem and you all were very kind and gentle, warm-hearted and truly inspirational. I have posted before on another website gay forum and they were really nasty and unkind.
Again, I appreciate all of you and thank you from the bottom of my heart.

And the rest of the story…...Lee went ballistic last night when he realized I would be leaving soon and the William is out of state and can't afford to come to his rescue.  He pushed me, slammed doors and was very mean and ugly to me. After all I have done for him. The sad part of this whole situation is that I have no where to go and I guess I will try to put my things in storage and live on the streets until I can find somewhere to live. I truly appreciate all of your advice and well wishes. Thank you!

UPDATE: I had a conversation with Lee (the blind guy) today and the relationship has ended. I will be moving out as soon as I can find a place to live. I was an idiot and I guess you live, love and truly learn.

The sex is good with Lee, so yes there is a sex in the relationship. But I will have to agree it is time to move on and I am working on that..when you have no money ( I am on disability as well) it is hard to start over and that is where I feel stuck in this situation. Thank you for all your advice and I am open to more!

Lee (the blind guy) does receive government benefits in the amount of $700 a month (which I think is a horrible amount to live on). I am paying my part here and he pays some too! As far as cameras  and recording what is going on…no...would never stoop to that, if that was the case I would just move on. Like I said Lee and William have been friends for 8 years, which is cool, but I feel William needs to stop all the calling constantly since Lee is in a relationship with me, William should understand that we are trying to build a life together. I can't find a way to tell William to slow it down or stop without Lee finding out and causing another argument. If I were William, I would leave them alone and let them have the relationship and not do anything to jeopardize the situation...I guess this is what I can not understand. Yes I agree it is a bizarre situation. Lee saying William was always there for me when I needed something....now I am here for him if he needs anything but the way Lee thinks is that since William and he have known each other and helped each other out for 8 years...William comes before me since I have only been in the picture 1 year...go figure...I don't see it that way at all. HELP!

Funny they are on the phone talking now…I guess William is telling Lee goodnight (there is a 2 hour time difference). He calls when he wakes up, on his way to work, on his break, on his lunch, on his afternoon break, when he is on his way home and sometimes after dinner, then before he goes to bed....I am so sick of this I could puke. I guess I am the idiot and the stupid one for being so naive. Yes, he paid for gas when he could but he ate off of me as well. I bought $500 worth of groceries one month and William ate over 1/2 of it......I am considering looking for another place to live and not sure if I even want another lover. Loving someone has brought me grief too many times. Now they are off the phone and I get to hear it once again that if things don't go well for William and his 2nd new job in less than one month that Lee told William that he could come back here....I am closer and closer to being out of here! Lee who is totally blind will be lost without me...I bet if I left tonight William would be back in a week.....getting so over this and fast.

William is calling my partner on his cell phone….I can not change the number or have no means to block the number which would just make matters worse here.

Thanks to everyone so far for your advice. I agree as well that we should share a room if he comes back…I don't want him to come back period. This may seem unfair to most, but he caused havoc here, started a fire in the kitchen, talks to his other friends on the phone about what Lee and I are doing..in front of us. I plan special evenings for Lee and I and he always has a way of coming to come inbetween the plans and I just cancel the plans because no matter what it is planned..he makes sure it doesn't happen. I am forever ask to take him somewhere and I feel he is just a third at times. I want a relationship with Lee only and not a threesome. Like I said he forever calls 7 or 8 times and sometimes while we are out to eat, making love (my dick goes limp), in a discussion or you name it, we are interrupted to no end. I have asked Lee to please ask him to limit his calls and Lee refuses and said William is just lonely.....whatever!

Okay so here is the deal….I met a guy online about 9 months ago, he is totally blind. We really hit it off and it was going really well. He was in the process of moving to my town so I helped him get moved in and settled. He told me he had a good friend that was going to live with him and that they had been friends for over 8 years which I thought was cool. I finally met the friend 2 weeks later. What a freak. I know this is a long post (sorry). So the blind guy I was seeing (let me call him Lee) asked me to start staying at his home. I did and finally was convinced to move in with him (we really were compatible, I thought). Well the guy that is his friend (let's call him William) is a really stupid idiot. He could not keep a job, has no street smarts, can't use a computer, and was a bus driver (nothing against bus drivers). He lost a really good job driving because he kept running into cars and damaging the bus got fired. So when I moved in Lee wanted me to take the second bedroom and I did. Come to find out William would be sleeping on the floor in Lees room. I did not appreciate this at all, but let it go.  I also was the only one with a car, transporting everyone everywhere. Finally,William moved to another state to get another job because he could not find one here. Now, Lee tells William that if it doesn't work out that he can move back here with us. I have decided that if he moves back in here that I will most likely leave and end the relationship. William calls Lee about 7 or 8 times a day and I have become very tired and jealous of this Whats your thoughts or take on the situation. BTW...when William lived here he would stare at Lee and his dick would get hard in his pants...and that used to drive me insane. Since Lee is blind he had no clue until I told him. What should I do? What is your take on the friendship? This situation have caused several arguments between Lee and I and I am seeking your advice on the situation. Am I wrong?