i don't remember the exact year/age, but i know it was during/after watching the music video for "What's My Age Again" by Blink 182.
a quick youtube search indicates that the video (or at least the song) was released in 1999. so, after doing the math that was 19 years ago, so maybe 12(?) i don't know the month of the release date but likely during the summer between 5th and 6th grade.
this is when i consider my first time jerking off because it included ejaculation. i was already experiencing erections and knew it felt good, but i didn't really know what to do about it. and even though i already knew about erections and semen and all that from Sex Ed in 5th grade, it still caught me by surprise, like, "whoa! that's never happened before!"
i don't recall much before this, no occurrence was really noteworthy enough for me to remember.
i do remember having the house to myself that day. the family all went out somewhere and i was trusted to stay alone for a while. i was sitting in the recliner in the living room flipping channels on TV (the good old days of cable /s) when suddenly i saw naked guys running around public streets/sidewalks - probably MTV. i don't remember if i'd discovered porn at this time, and any male nudity i'd seen on TV and movies was certainly more "socially appropriate", but it definitely caught my attention - naked guys (censored) in a public setting and on a regular viewing channel - whoa!
(it only occurs to me as i'm typing this that maybe my interest in the "public" genre of porn comes from this)
most of the details are lost to me after all this time and because i was so hyped up, like, was i really seeing this?
i want to say that the same music video played again a little later, like maybe there was a playlist on repeat(?)
i got brave and undid my pants and took my dick out and started touching myself, not in any expert way of course. more details are fuzzy here and the next thing i know there's a cloudy/clearish white liquid spurting onto my hand. after the initial shock, because this was the first time that happened, i remember going to the kitchen with my pants still open grabbing a paper towel to clean up and then… the rest of that memory is lost to me. i don't recall feeling better or worse or confused, i don't recall what i did right after - i guess my brain just didn't record anything to the data banks directly following the event.
i keep saying this, i'm sorry (i don't recall) but... i don't remember being really all that attracted to any of the members of the band at the time. i think i was just caught up in the gratuitous nudity, the likes of which i'd never seen before.
i'm viewing the video on youtube right now as a refresher and as far as what they looked like in '99, meh, not bad - i think maybe the bassist kind of does it for me - but whatever i thought about them then is kind of overshadowed by my opinions and personal tastes i have now.
so there you have it, Blink 182 got me started whacking it with one of their music videos!
