Very tight asshole
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Can anyone give me some tips? I'm desperate to be a good bottom, but for physical reasons I just can't take anything more than a finger up my ass (must be genetic - I have trouble with "in-ear" music buds too, so all my holes seem to be on the tight side.) I've tried small dildos but even with lube and going slow, it still hurts a lot. Any advice?
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@mikehunt42 I believe there may be some sort of lubricant that'll relax the anal muscles to maybe help them stretch further. However I've never tried it yet, but I've heard about it.
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@mikehunt42 You body is simply not accustom to getting things in your hole. It's something your body need to learn similar to other thing your body just know how to do link wink an eye. It take time and practice. Best is to start with a small dildo and learn to relax.
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@mikehunt42 : What the two other responders said. If you look on Amazon or similar website for "Desensitizing Lube," you should find quite a few choices. Such lube "desensitizes and slightly numbs the applied area," to quote one vendor. I've never personally used it but it doesn't cost that much and would be worth a try.
The most important thing is to understand that it's going to take time and practice to train your body to accept the intrusion. You can get dildos and anal probes in all sizes, from ones no thicker than your little finger to traffic cone size. Start with the smallest and practice, practice, practice.
One bit of advice is to place the anal probe just at the entry and to hold it there with just a small amount of pressure. If you're tensing up, which you likely are given your past experience, then the muscles there will fight the entry, causing pain and inhibiting entry.
Those muscles aren't all that strong, though. If you apply just enough pressure to cause them to tense up but not pushing to the point of pain, they will relax a short time later because you just cannot keep them tensed very long. That's the point where you can push a little harder and insert the probe. With the muscles relaxed, it should be both easier and less painful.
Keep practicing until you can get and keep the muscles relaxed every time. Be patient and understand that it will take a while for this to be really comfortable. Once you're comfortable with the smallest size, you can start working your way up.
Good luck!
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@nf16 +Arago44 +bobo060. Thanks so much for the advice. I'm starting to practice already and will continue now that I know that, with time, I'll be able to reach my goal. Thanks again!
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@mikehunt42 No problem dear.
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@mikehunt42 Please do NOT follow the advice of the lubes that numb the muscles!! The #1 rule is if you feel pain, you stop right away! And you will continue later or another day. With time you will be able to open your hole more and more. But never accept pain. It is not normal to feel pain, pain is a signal from the brain that you might get hurt, so how can you realize you are hurting if you asthetize the area. And believe me injuries in the anal area are very painful. Plus, you're supposed to feel things to enjoy sex, if you're anesthetized, it would be sooooo dull and this is NOT the objective. So never accept pain, even if the top is the sexiest man, tell him to fuck off.
In regard to training your hole. Here are some beginner's tips. It's all a question of mechanics, it's all about anatomy and a bit about psychology.
You have to combine contractions of your hole (push / squeeze), your breath (exhale / inhale) and take the right angle (when lying down the dick faces down to get in. When on all fours the dick faces up).
Push an object (dildo or any other phallic-shaped thing) against your hole without inserting it. While you inhale for 5 seconds, you squeeze your hole, then you exhale for 5 seconds and push your hole at the same time. Do that multiple times and you will feel that your hole will suck the object in, even you will be surprised how magical it is.
On a side note, you have to know how to control the pelvic muscle (the one you squeeze when you want to stop peeing). You have to strengthen this muscle, every day you tighten and you loosen your muscles for several minutes.
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Get an inflatable butt-plug, it'll loosen you-up in no-time!
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Is there an inflatable plug you'd recommend, btw?
