Open relationship?
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has anyone been in an open relation?
how u guys work it out?
i want to do say it to my partner yet im afraid -
find a right time and talk about it with your bf.
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My spouse and I were in an open relationship for 39 years. My only advice would be honest with each other. If you can keep sex and love separate, it may work for you. We each had other sex partners and liked to tell each other about those encounters. Somehow it made our sex like that much better. Sometimes we even shared by having 3 or more ways together.
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My partner and I brought up the idea of it casually at first but then sat down and had a serious conversation when we both agreed it was something we really wanted to try. We even went as far as writing out rules we wanted both of us to follow, but i felt it was well worth it.
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open relationship = friends with benefits
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@edudorado
Or close friends who share expenses -
@geobear40 said in Open relationship?:
@edudorado
Or close friends who share expensesI'm sorry, but insisting that non-monogamous relationships "are not real" is judgemental and pedantic... it's no different than straight people who once insisted that 2 men couldn't "actually love" one another the same way straight couples did!
Hogwash!
There are no simple rules that you can apply to all human relationships - some couples stop having sex in their 30's or 40s - when they want to stop having children; while others have sex well into their 80's (if not longer)!
No only are there perfectly healthy relationships that are non-monogamous, but some are "poly-amorous'" - that is, groups of 3 or more who all love each other and have sex with each other... some of these poly-amorous relationships are straight (men and women, with only heterosexual sex), some are gay (only men or only women), and some are bisexual (men and women, with sex occurring between ANY two being acceptable).
I happen to personally know a gay couple - now married - who have never had sex together (nor outside their relationship), and they are VERY happy together! (On a site dedicated to porn, I can understand if some of you are incredulous as to this claim, but they are real! I've known them for more than 15 years!)
I also had a relationship when i was younger, and we tried to make it an "open" relationship... we had a LOT of sex, both together, and with others... but it broke down when deceit crept in...
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@bi4smooth
You read a lot into my post.It is my opinion. We still have that right to have different opinions in this country.
You may state your thoughts and I will respect them and I wish people would do the same for mine.
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@geobear40 said in Open relationship?:
@bi4smooth
You read a lot into my post.It is my opinion. We still have that right to have different opinions in this country.
You may state your thoughts and I will respect them and I wish people would do the same for mine.
I'm sorry if you took offense, but while I certainly would not stand in judgement of you, should you declare that YOU couldn't be in an "open relationship"! When you're talking about yourself, I have no qualms about anything you believe about what's an acceptable relationship - FOR YOU!
But, when you make the blanket claim that all "open relationships" are just "friends with benefits" (or some other label that diminishes the value or importance of their relationship), I take offense.
Speak for yourself and we have no beef.
Attempt to re-label others based on your own beliefs, and we do, indeed have a beef.With that said, if I misinterpreted your remarks (short as they were), I apologize.
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If you have needs outside of your relationship then maybe you should rethink if that relationship is working for you. If I can't provide for my partners needs and wants and him for me then maybe the relationship is not working.
I feel that those types of relationships are selfish in a way. They don't want to settle and work toward a stable loving family they want to keep one toe in and keep their options open. They want to redefine what a relationship is to fit what they want to do. Call it something else and be happy in their chosen state. .
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@geobear40 said in Open relationship?:
If you have needs outside of your relationship then maybe you should rethink if that relationship is working for you. If I can't provide for my partners needs and wants and him for me then maybe the relationship is not working.
I feel that those types of relationships are selfish in a way. They don't want to settle and work toward a stable loving family they want to keep one toe in and keep their options open. They want to redefine what a relationship is to fit what they want to do. Call it something else and be happy in their chosen state. .
Those are your ideals - and just like your shoes, they won't fit everyone else... stick with the "I" statements and dispense with the "they" statements.... you have no right to speak for others, nor to judge (much less label) their relationships!
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@bi4smooth
I have every right to comment on other peoples actions. It's called free speech -
@geobear40 said in Open relationship?:
@bi4smooth
I have every right to comment on other peoples actions. It's called free speechYou are truly clueless.... on so many levels.
Free speech rights have to do with criticizing the Government, not about anything anywhere about anyone! Thus, there are laws on Copyright, Trademark, Patent, & Plagiarism (taking another's work and representing them as your own). There are also laws against saying things to incite others to violence (inciting a riot, for example).
You know, just because you (presumably) have one, doesn't mean you have to be a dick to everyone else!
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@bi4smooth said in Open relationship?:
You know, just because you (presumably) have one, doesn't mean you have to be a dick to everyone else!
I thought we agreed to respect each others opinions? We can disagree but not revert to name calling.
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Can we get back to the nice subject of open relationships?
(For free speech you guys can start another feed.)Most friends of mine with an open relationship seem to make it work nicely. I might even conclude that their relationships are better then the closed relationships.
It helps to prevent lots of frustrations within the relationship.
