I "ignored" a lot of toilet cruising signals to this day
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To be honest, for the most part of my life I've been unaware of the cruising signals that you might get while in the stall (foot tapping or sliding under the stall etc...). In recent years I've come to understand these signals, but on the rare occasion that I might have noticed such signals, I never acted upon them out of fear that it might be innocent and unwanted
I even read that a signal can be as common as coughing, which is even more riskier imo.
I would really like to be more daring when I recognize an opportunity... what suggestion do you have? did you ever misinterpreted? any negative consequences?
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@Kekkaishi I've never responded to this sort of thing in a public toilet, although I have in gym showers/changing rooms.
As for "negative consequences"--there's the remote possibility that it might be a sting operation. See https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Larry_Craig_scandal for a story about 15 years ago when a US senator got arrested for toilet cruising at the Minneapolis/St. Paul airport. He claims it was all a misunderstanding, blah, blah, blah...but when people checked his senate office internet server logs, they found searches earlier that day for "gay cruising Minneapolis," so the guy had this all planned out.
As an amusing side note, for several years following that incident I would frequently connect flights through that airport. The toilet where the senator was busted became quite the tourist attraction.
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@Kekkaishi to be really honest with you, it kinda depends a lot... You can be 100% sure cruising happens in every public restroom out there, but some places are not notoriously known for that, meaning it's rarer...
In such places the chances of misinterpreting signals are much higher, and you might not end well. But there are places that are kind of famous, for lack of a better word, for this particular behavior.
It varies a lot from city to city, the overall design of the restroom influences on how good they are for the cruising.Also parks are a place to keep an eye on, they're very popular.
This applies for big cities, if you're in a small city I'd say pretty much anywhere is way riskier. The amount of guys that will signal to you and then second guess or act aggressively if you retribute, bro... It really is tiresome.
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@Kekkaishi I did it a couple times in a gym shower/sauna. And to be sure we went back and forth quite a bit. Even the second time I met him we were extra cautious, ended up moving somewhere more private.
Did it on a park trail, I saw this guy I was fairly sure. He walked past and I was far off the path, we made eye contact, but he kept going. Then he came back again and I rubbed my bulge. He followed me far off trail.
I'm not sure where you are at but there are sites for cruising listings including dangers and signals. E.g. this bathroom is good because it has a loud door.
Overall though, probably safest to stick to a hookup app! Especially in a smaller city or less gay friendly area.
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I'm far from a prude, but from my perspective, public sex -- in venues like store bathrooms, gyms, highway rest stops, and urban parks to name a few -- is inappropriate.
Often enough, the participants are caught by surprise, while others find a thrill in the occasional exposure.
In either scenario, when public sex acts subject other people to an unexpected and unwanted experience, it's sexual harassment. These third parties who stumble in on such antics can be parents with small children, for example.
Watch public sex fantasies as porn, if it suits you. But in today's real world -- with the Internet, clubs and other ways to hook up -- it's time to move on.