Is having kids just to feel fulfilled a bad idea?
-
I'm thinking ability has to be considered before deciding to have a child
-
Yes it is a bad idea.
-
Yes, I think it's a pretty bad reason, yet it seems to be the very reason most people of all races, classes, genders and orientations do it. I could certainly think of many far worse reasons to have kids, but I personally have a hard time coming up with good reasons to have kids at all.
I had this discussion with my mother just yesterday, actually, about how people who want kids ought to think long and hard about WHY they want kids, and to recollect every horrible thing that's gone wrong in their lifetimes (to them and to the world at large) and really seriously consider if it's worth potentially putting a child through all of that and more just to "give you something to do" or to have "a little you" around. Life's not always dark and horrible, I know, but it's something people never seem to consider when deciding to have a kid
All I know is I have a lot of problems with anxiety and depression, and I wouldn't wish that on anyone, even if it means "living on" through procreation, which is a BS concept to me anyway.
I think, if you are truly prepared for a child, you should have one if you want one. I just don't think most people really ever are prepared when it comes to considering all the negative existential implications of bringing a child into the world.
EDIT: I'd also like to add, if you have to have a kid, it's really a good idea to consider adoption. That way you at least don't have to live with the guilt of bringing someone into the world, only about screwing them up with bad parenting. ;D
-
Bad idea but I think people change with parenthood. Nobody is really ever prepared to have a child, it happens somehow and people learn.
-
actually, it's clear u don't give shit about it! so please do the kid a favor and don't have it
-
Yes, it's bad.
On one hand one can probably NEVER be prepared with raising a kid completely,
and at the same time there are stories of people who have unwanted child(ren) (which implies a certain lack of readiness before having a child) and still manage to be a good parent.
but there's bound to be a certain…ugh, awareness, or competence, or AT LEAST responsibility before having kids. -
Unless you actually WANT kids for other reasons then yeah because they most likely won't fill the void anyhow.
-
Being 'fulfilled' seems subjective. If someone means having a kid to give their life a purpose because didn't know what they were doing with it before, then yeah that's bad.
But having a kid because you feel it's just a natural part of life to have a kid to raise, then I wouldn't say that's bad. I mean having a kid seems like a part in everyone's life that they have as an eventual goal as having some part of you carried on to the next generation is a natural urge.
-
If you're considering not having a child, check out the /r/antinatalism subreddit for some good relevant reading material
-
Is there any other reason?
I think that is what it all boils down to in the end.
Wrong or not you will be in good company . I am pretty certain that is reasoning behind most births (most likely your own)
-
Yeah it is, I love kids but I'm more of a great uncle to my nieces and nephews, I don't want a kid of my own just for the sake of "just to feel fulfilled"
-
Yeah, it is pretty bad idea
-
You should "want" to have a kid first! No parent is ever ready for children but they should truly desire to have one before making or adopting.
-
It's bad if one is interested in making a political statement. Kids are a huge responsibility.
-
Seriously? ???
What kind of void are you trying to fill?
Maybe you should start with a puppy; and in your case, definitely some type of "loaner." One you help raise for a little while, like some of the "service" dogs.
That way, the poor thing won't have to suffer, should you still find yourself "unfulfilled," and lose interest.
-
Yes of course. It sounds pretty reckless & irresponsible for me as a reason.
-
I will say having kids anyways when one partner doesn't want any is a bad idea.
-
Depends on the true reason behind it, of course.
Many have been saying that it's wrong, a bad idea, and they have valid and logical arguments about it. Nothing wrong with that.
But in a way, if your intention is good and not negative, then I don't see why not. You just need to consider the responsibility and all the little things like money, expense, and stuffs that comes after having ones. If those doesn't trouble you or bother your morale conscious, then go ahead. Hey, it might just be the right answer to your life.
But perhaps… like Ellis said, try with a pet first? See if you can manage one. If you can't even deal with a non-demanding pet, then I doubt you'll be ready for human kids. It'll be more bad for them too.
-
The idea of having kids has been ingrained in us since childhood, with our parents dropping not-so-subtle comments like, “You'll know how it feels when you have kids of your own” or “I'll spoil my grandchildren.”
The importance of reproduction also has roots in religion. In Christian faiths, Adam and Eve were put on earth to reproduce and start the human race. Big families, which are sometimes the result of refusing contraception, are especially common in Christian households.
Then, of course, there is the influence of pop culture on reproducing. Movies like “Baby Mama” and “What to Expect When You're Expecting” perpetuate the idea that having kids of your own will somehow fulfill your entire life.
Maybe having your own children will make your life worthwhile. It could also make your life much more stressful for social or financial reasons!
-
Yes, that is a very bad idea.
Many more reasons to have kids besides that.
like love. Real love.
