Not sexually attracted to fat men..?
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Sexual preference exist. That is one. And it's okay. It's ironic that I'm fat myself and fat guys….mostly just didn't do with me.
but:
- There's a line when expressing your preference becomes discrimination.
- There's also a line when you consider personal preference as an universal preference and/or law.
Try to avoid these, both mentally....and in your actions and words and thoughts.
Without knowing anything about your life and your actions (thus, mostly working from a blank slate)
Remember that your sexual preference is not extended to your platonic reference. Try to make friends with ANYBODY regardless of their physical appearances.
Remember that we are all people-- no one wants to be hurt. Regardless of how attractive / unattractive they are.
Remember that people have different circumstances. Someone might be fat due to poverty; others their biological makeup.Of course it's not going to be POSSIBLE all the time-- some people will get hurt no matter how gentle / diplomatic / polite our rejection is. That's the nature of life, that's the nature of human relationships.
But do try.
And then what I personally found out is that, attraction changes as we grow up and met someone new.
So at least do keep your heart open, and your penis aware. Who knows-- your attraction might have some outliers here and there
lostalone sums it up well
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No one is "better" than anyone but that doesn't mean you should feel guilty for recognizing what you prefer. Fat people = people. Skinny people = people. Assholes = assholes.
Also the "don't be rude" bit is basic. Just try to be a compassionate human. Think about straight people saying something like "it's okay to think gays are revolting but don't be rude about it." I hope you can understand why that's absolutely not acceptable regardless of what one believes.
Would you be friends with a fat guy? No? You should feel guilty. Depends on the human? That's nice.
Completely agree with you there. And two of my best friends are big guys. It's just the fact that I don't want to have sex with them. And thankfully, because of all the replies I've gotten in this topic, I feel like that's okay.
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Im the exact opposite of you. I only attracted to fat man. I guess preference cant be forced, so its ok to be not attracted to fat man.
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Everyone has their own taste.
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I love fat men, I am the opposite. I feel atracted by hairy, fat and bald men. It is my dream being fucked by one.
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I love fat men, I am the opposite. I feel atracted by hairy, fat and bald men. It is my dream being fucked by one.
:cheesy2: What are you doing Friday night? >:D 
Honestly, when anyone says skinny, I say, WTF? He's HOT! I donno why thin guys turn me on so much. I just go with it. We should all do that more often. And if a guy takes offense because you don't want to date him, forget him. Trust me, you didn't want to date that guy no matter WHAT he looks like. He's the type that will put your bunny in a pot of water on the stove.
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what others call fat i define as "well cushioned".
it's probably my depression talking "I'm pretty skinny myself" but i find them pretty attractive.
Add on some fur and/or beard and they become almost irresistable.
Top it off with a smile and i'm almost on a platter ready to be served.
I'm pretty much finished if i hear a deep booming voice coming from that throat. -
No, I'm not into fat men.
I might accept it if I fell in love with one but as for finding them attractive - no.
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I think it's just a matter of preferences, I personally dont get turned on by fat men too
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I like all sort of guys, I find fat men atractive.
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Sometimes I'm really attracted to guys who have a little "bit extra".
I'm rarely if ever attracted to guys who are super skinny or super fat, though.
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I am a bear who finds other bears (and cubs) completely unattractive.
I prefer non-hairy or somewhat hairy men and thin to average to athletic builds.
One result of this, I realized, is that I do not have a good body image of myself – because since I am a bear and I don't find bears attractive, I do not find myself attractive.
I have longed realized that while my bear body is not one I find sexy, my body is attractive to some gay men who are NOT bears. Fortunately, it does not seem to be very many guys who feel this way.
I am just so damn different from gay guys in general (for example, I have little interest in hookups), I have been looking for a possible partner for decades now with just no luck at all.
It is extremely depressing for me.
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I am a bear who finds other bears (and cubs) completely unattractive.
I prefer non-hairy or somewhat hairy men and thin to average to athletic builds.
One result of this, I realized, is that I do not have a good body image of myself – because since I am a bear and I don't find bears attractive, I do not find myself attractive.
I have longed realized that while my bear body is not one I find sexy, my body is attractive to some gay men who are NOT bears. Fortunately, it does not seem to be very many guys who feel this way.
I am just so damn different from gay guys in general (for example, I have little interest in hookups), I have been looking for a possible partner for decades now with just no luck at all.
It is extremely depressing for me.
. . .I really do feel for you that you are looking for a partner for decades but do not lose hope u dont know what is around the corner keep your hopes high and u will definitely find that special someone I was in your shoes but now I am happy with the love of my life … PLUS U SIR ARE SEXY THERE ARE A LOT OF PEOPLE LIKE ME OUT THERE WHO LOVE BEARS so don't even say that you feel not attractive have a great day
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Thank you for your message, buy I really do not have much hope anymore. I'm 63 years old now.
I just spend about 10 days of a gay dating site sending messages to about 400 different guys and got back about 6 answers of those interested. I spend a LOT of time writing messages to each and more.
I talked and chat with them each a fair amount and they were interesting in meeting so we sent up days and times to meet. One guy even texted me that he would come down and meet in in about 2 hours.
Not one of them showed up. Not only that but they have all ghosted me; they never called to tell me they were not coming. None of them have answered my replied about why they did not come and about possibility meeting again.
One of these was with a "guy" who I had exchanged emails and had Skyped a good dead with – until I realized 1/2 through it was all a hoax. A friend told me this was called "catfishing".
This is how my attempts to meet and date a guy constantly goes. This has happened over and over again for DECADES now. I cannot tell you the lengths I have gone to meet a guy to date. And it is almost always the same. They say they are interesting, we plan to meet, they never show up.
A few times I have meet a guy, well, some of them end it even before we have much of a chance to talk.
In some ways I think the worse one for me was about 10 years ago. I was suppose to meet a guy for coffee. I waited over an hour after he was suppose to show before I left. I had called him several times to see if he was coming or not, but he never answered. He never called me to tell me why he did come.
I tired to call a few times in the following days to see what happened but only ever got voice mail. Finally, I asked a friend if I could use his phone to call and he said okay. So I called this guy (from a different number) and he picked up at once. I asked he why he never showed up and he said "I felt like doing something else." Then he hung up.
Nowadays, if a guy doesn't show up -- which as I said is always -- I make one or two efforts to find out why and if they still might want to meet, but that is all. Even as I send those messages, I know no one is going to reply.
I go through this like every 6-8 months. I just completely burn out on trying to meet anyone and then months and months later I try again -- and they same shit happens. No one shows up then I am ghosted.
I do understand you are trying to help me feel positive that I will meet someone. But I stopped lying to myself about that long ago.
I make the effort because I REALLY want to find a partner. But I do not fool myself to think that I will.
. . .
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Thank you for your message, buy I really do not have much hope anymore. I'm 63 years old now.
I just spend about 10 days of a gay dating site sending messages to about 400 different guys and got back about 6 answers of those interested. I spend a LOT of time writing messages to each and more.
I talked and chat with them each a fair amount and they were interesting in meeting so we sent up days and times to meet. One guy even texted me that he would come down and meet in in about 2 hours.
Not one of them showed up. Not only that but they have all ghosted me; they never called to tell me they were not coming. None of them have answered my replied about why they did not come and about possibility meeting again.
One of these was with a "guy" who I had exchanged emails and had Skyped a good dead with – until I realized 1/2 through it was all a hoax. A friend told me this was called "catfishing".
This is how my attempts to meet and date a guy constantly goes. This has happened over and over again for DECADES now. I cannot tell you the lengths I have gone to meet a guy to date. And it is almost always the same. They say they are interesting, we plan to meet, they never show up.
A few times I have meet a guy, well, some of them end it even before we have much of a chance to talk.
In some ways I think the worse one for me was about 10 years ago. I was suppose to meet a guy for coffee. I waited over an hour after he was suppose to show before I left. I had called him several times to see if he was coming or not, but he never answered. He never called me to tell me why he did come.
I tired to call a few times in the following days to see what happened but only ever got voice mail. Finally, I asked a friend if I could use his phone to call and he said okay. So I called this guy (from a different number) and he picked up at once. I asked he why he never showed up and he said "I felt like doing something else." Then he hung up.
Nowadays, if a guy doesn't show up -- which as I said is always -- I make one or two efforts to find out why and if they still might want to meet, but that is all. Even as I send those messages, I know no one is going to reply.
I go through this like every 6-8 months. I just completely burn out on trying to meet anyone and then months and months later I try again -- and they same shit happens. No one shows up then I am ghosted.
I do understand you are trying to help me feel positive that I will meet someone. But I stopped lying to myself about that long ago.
I make the effort because I REALLY want to find a partner. But I do not fool myself to think that I will.
. . .
Hey…I don't really have much dating experience in general, so I definitely don't expect to give you any groundbreaking advice, but if there's one thing I've learnt that is so important, at least in my opinion, it's to NEVER LOSE HOPE!!
I don't think there's much else I can say atm -
Sounds like you really had it rough, bostonpolar. If I had gone through that, I'm not sure I could keep on hoping either. You've had a run of bad luck finding all those people who don't have the maturity to tell you to your face when they aren't interested. Ghosting is such a cowardly thing to do.
Piece of unsolicited advice- if you keep running into the same problems, maybe reexamine the type of guys you are attracted to. If you like them young, you might find that they aren't interested in something serious, or in settling down. Maybe change it up a little and meet someone older, with more maturity? Just a thought. Keep trying, and best of luck to you! -
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Piece of unsolicited advice- if you keep running into the same problems, maybe reexamine the type of guys you are attracted to. If you like them young, you might find that they aren't interested in something serious, or in settling down. Maybe change it up a little and meet someone older, with more maturity? Just a thought.
–--------I also had that thought. I have I am looking for guys between 20-40yo; I really would like to find a guy around 30.
The guys who stood me up were 26 to 51 yo. Three of them were over 40.
I basically had to start looking at guys in their 40s and 50s about 15-20 years ago, because almost no one younger than 40 was ever interested.
(I should mention I have also tried gay younger-for-older sites as well and again run into this experience over and over. There it tends to be talk, talk, talk, but when it comes to actually meeting, they never want to set something up.)
Almost all of the guys who look at my profile are older than me and that does not interest me at all. Younger guys tend to be fems or CDs and that does not interest me either; I want a guy who is a guy.
Believe me, if I told you more about how I have searched, the more you would know how this is a pounding-my-head-against-a-brick-wall experience for me. I even started a national literary group (that is still in existence 30 years later) to try to meet some guys and that didn't work.
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I'm overweight and not attracted to fat people, so don't worry.
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For me it's about not being attracted to people who don't care about themselves.
If someone doesn't care what they look like, what right do they have to demand others see them how they want?
I've seen both men and women who are overweight but attractive and even healthy in a way. That is attractive. Slobs are not.
Definitely not into skinny either. -
I've seen both men and women who are overweight but attractive and even healthy in a way. That is attractive. Slobs are not.
Well I got really fat in the last couple of years because I was stuck in a really shit town with nothing to do and no where to go. I didn't have a car because I was use to living in a large system and using mass transit. Then mass transit there was a fucking joke and shut down at 9pm and didn't even run on Sundays.
Plus I just had NOTHING in common with the people around me. I tried hard to find friends and the one friend I made was generally anti-social.
I got out of that hell-hole earlier this year and am not in a place where there are a lot more places to go around me and access to Boston's major transit system. Still do not have a car, though, and that does limit me; just can no longer afford one. Still difficult to meet people I have anything in common with.
Health-wise, I'm watching my weight more and trying to loose the weight I put on in those 2 1/2 years. Trying to exercise and just walk around more because I lost some of my flexibility being in a tiny apartment in that zombie town.
And also health-wise, beyond being far too fat, my health is excellent. Just saw my physician this month and everything came back fine to great. Even with all this extra weight, my blood pressure is normal. My body temperature is below average – usually between 97.8-98.4 -- but that is normal for me.
Thing is, when I am with others or with one person in particular, I usually feel great and have a good time. It's just finding others -- or that special someone -- that has become such a major problem.
. . .
