Glad to hear that, and congrats

Mmmm, coming out does have that chance of changing our actions and behaviors. From my own personal experience at least, I become much more willing to talk about certain topics. I'm also becoming somewhat less guarded, and both will change people's perception of me.

On the other side, people can very well develop their own false perception about you. They start reading patterns out of nothing. Suspicions started to born from actions that have no meaning.

And new information always have that chance to change a dynamic, yes.

I don't know about you, but if you feel you're not changing in any way, then the most you can do about it is communicate everything on your side clearly.

"Look, I noticed that you seem to act differently around me these days. For example,

The whole point about coming out is opening ourselves to let others inside a previously hidden part of us.
By that definition, we also invite rejection and avoidance.

As long as you're not harming others (by having a double life, say), the only metric you should use is how comfortable and free you are with your life decisions.
If you find yourself enjoying a more subdued life without being out and proud, then by all means, you do you.

At the same time, I find myself questioning the idea that being out in any way = being shoved in a certain box and treated accordingly. I don't think you're giving your friends enough credit.

If you're married and secretly having homosexual affair in the side, then yes, I do think you should come out for the sake of your wife and children.

But outside from that, coming out should be a matter of YOU. Do you feel trapped with the way things are? Do you wish others can know you better?

I like early SeanCody. These days I feel like it's been decreasing in quality and the stars aren't my type.

also, IconMale and its sister site, NoirMale. YAY FOR PORN WITH FEELINGS GODDAMMIT.

@demo3:

@Kipowen:

good reaction from the porn stars is of no value if they are not goodlooking. daigo, manato, naoki are some of the hottest porn stars.

Good-looking and good reaction are not mutually exclusive though. Chiba Yuto, Keito and Keisuke Ikegami are both good looking and enjoy having sex.

I hate Atsushi Daido. He's like a Greek sculpture: he has a gorgeous body but is always stiff like a log. I don't like anyone doing gay-for-pay

BIG MOOD.

Atsushi Daigo is….

...sigh.
So handsome.
So disinterested.

SIGH.

I think there's also another (Latino) porn stars who are like that...

insofar as big names are concerned, I'm much more preferring Masaki Koh. He can certainly elevate his bottoms-- even Atsushi Daigo.

Thank you for the recommendations, by the way! I'll definitely check it out.

Scat, golden showers, bloodsports, fisting. Yep, no thanks.

Racist and homophobic overtones aren't my jam either. I'll forgive it when the sex is really hot, or when the guys are very attractive, but even then my enjoyment have been decreased.

Also, passionless sex. Sex where people are just sticking tab A into slot B and ah ah ah AH OH YES OH YES OH FUCK FUCK YES– yawn Again, I'll forgive it when the guys are very attractive, but EVEN THEN.

These days, after reading the news, I'm enjoying cop fetish and harassment-based sex videos less and less. Some parts of me are becoming more aware that IT WOULDN'T HAPPEN LIKE THAT IN REAL LIFE

Twinks and Bears, I tend to like 'em mixed. Size differences ftw.

If it works for you, go for it.

For me, it's 70:30 on it being a turnoff.

Pro:
Done well, it can take away the sting of humiliation, leaving just the lewdness. And sometimes I do want filth and dirty talk.

Con:
For me, those who use it just sounds like they're trying too hard to be a MAN. Insecurity and desperation is very unbecoming (and ironically, not very manly)
Its effect is based on humiliation. I don't particularly enjoy humiliation.
Worse, its humiliation is based on femmephobia, or the idea that you're somehow 'worse' for being feminine or having a pussy.

The permanent one is scent. Oh, and also size difference.
And I'm more of a face type of person rather than abs or ass or anything.

The rest..it comes and goes.

Hmmm.

Brandon from Sean Cody.
From the same studio; Brodie.
XL
Robert Axel
Daymin Voss
Marcos Rezende / Apollo from TheGuySite. so yum.
the late Arpad Miklos, may he rest in peace.
also the late Masaki Koh, may he rest in peace.
A couple of Latino porn stars, too, from Mundomais and such.
maybe Zeb Atlas.
maybe Jeremy Walker.
maybe Brad Kalvo.
maybe Ryan Bones.