Thanks.
We have sex according to a formula, with lights off. I like his body fine, even though it's not perfectly my fetish. He is sturdy and strong, but very insecure, considers himself too fat, and doesn't like his body. I don't think we ever talk about sex. Whenever I brought up masturbation he would say "you're not allowed to do that" in a joking-but-also-not-joking way. So that pretty much shut off all discussion of sex.
….are you implying he has a puritan / strict view of sex, or a...domineering personality?
We did have some discussion about how we spend time together. He needs to be more social, and he likes to go out. I don't drink at all and while I like being social I need to spend a lot of time at my desk to meet the career goals I've set for myself. That was also part of the reason I didn't want to move in. I just really didn't want to break my groove.
He told me he felt like I was judgmental when I counseled him. I mostly remember telling him he was being way too mean to himself. When he lets his guard down he is the sweetest most affectionate guy ever, and that makes me never want to do anything that could ever hurt him.
I think this is a good step, but yeah; seems you need more communication, and given your next post…that's...kind of dangerous.
And yes, I echo the professional suggestion.
