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    Posts made by pjbf1979

    • RE: My boyfriend cheated on me. What should I do?

      @mwitze5:

      I have read some text messages on my boyfriends phone. We are together for about 5 years. What shoud I tell to him? Should I break up just because of the texts or …Help

      Definitely have tests done to check for STIs.  Aside from that, what do you want to do?  We can all give you advice based on what we would do or have done, but we're not in the relationship.  Do you want to work things out?  Would you rather just leave?  It may or may not be the first time he's cheated but it almost dfinitely will not be the last.

      Either way, be prepared for him to be angry at you for reading the messages.  I am not saying you were wrong (nor right) to read them, but he will likely be angry.

      posted in Sex & Relationships
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      pjbf1979
    • RE: Are you attracted to transgender people?

      @zeropolis79:

      I don't mean to be offensive and I apologise. I''m unsure what pronoun to use..

      I understand.  I figured it wasn't intentional.  Best bet is to ask them which pronouns they prefer.  And, generally speaking, when you don't know (because you'll probably encounter a similar scenario at some point), just go with they as a pronoun.  Fuck anyone who tells you "they" as singular is incorrect.  We've been using it for ages that way.   😎

      posted in Sex & Relationships
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      pjbf1979
    • RE: Are you attracted to transgender people?

      @gaypraha2:

      don't mean to be offensive and I apologise.

      Don't apologies! pro gender, feminist, radical LGBT are just bullies and take any excuse to make a scene out of nothing. for instance I'll stick to a "mailMan" and **** mailperson and such. If they are too sensitive that's their problem. see you try to be gentle and nice by saying " he/she" but nooo that's not good enough..

      I'm hardly a bully.  If I were I would've been a dick in my comments instead of explaining that it's offensive and offering a suggestion or two.  I wasn't rude, I wasn't nasty (more than can be said your you, bitch).  I indicated that I knew it was likely unintentional.  Referring a person as he/she is rude.  idgaf about 'mailman' and 'fireman' etc.  That's apples and oranges.

      But since pronouns are irrelevant to you, I'll just refer to you as female.  You're sure as fuck acting like one.  And if you're going to call someone a bully, little girl, make sure YOU'RE not acting like one

      posted in Sex & Relationships
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      pjbf1979
    • RE: How long has it been…

      @hhsq:

      That must be difficult indeed. If I were in your shoes I'd try moving to a bigger, more cosmopolitan city and/or look for other trans people.

      I would like to, but right now I cant afford to live on my own; I'm back at home with a parent.  There are a couple cities nearby that are more LGBT friendly, though I don't drive, so the onus would be on the other person.

      I dabble in online dating occasionally, so I may find someone that way.  I'm not totally hopeless.  Just cynical.  ;D

      posted in Sex & Relationships
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      pjbf1979
    • RE: How long has it been…

      @hhsq:

      But I'm curious, if it's not so rude to ask, what is it that made you not have sax for 10 years?  :afr:

      For a few years, immediately following a promiscuous phase, it was a direct choice, but for reasons I'd rather not state.

      Then I started wanting more than one nighters and casual sex–not nec LTR but something where I felt safe mentally and physically.

      Then in 2010 I identified as trans, and needed to sort myself out, where I stood in terms of both gender and sexual identity.

      Being trans, most gay guys aren't interested (I'm FtMasculine).  Most straight guys aren't interested.  The very few bi people I know are either taken or not interested in me, so on and so forth.  The people I've met who do want a transperson are fetishists and I want to be someone's lover and/or partner, so I'm not interested in being fetishised.

      Take factors 2 and 3, add in that I live in a very small and relatively conservative area, am obese and not conventionally attractive, and a couple other factors, and the numbers don't stack up in favor of success.

      This really isn't as much of a pity party as it sounds like, I should add.

      posted in Sex & Relationships
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      pjbf1979
    • How long has it been…

      Since you've had sex.

      And what is the longest 'dry spell' (time without sex) you've ever had.

      For me, for both it's 10 years and 2 mos. Current -_-

      Anyone wanna help break that spell?  :funny2:

      posted in Sex & Relationships
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      pjbf1979
    • RE: Crystal meth _ Sex _ and …...... PLEASE HELP

      In the future, I strongly urge you to always use your own condoms when bottoming and handle them yourself (put it on him, etc).  While not 100% certain, you'll have a pretty good idea of the integrity (that he didn't sabotage it in some way) and that it's not expired.

      It's one area in which I am paranoid.  While I love stealthing in stories and fantasy, I don't want the Bug, and having seen somuch talk of stealthing elsewhere, I am paranoid about condoms.

      posted in Sex & Relationships
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      pjbf1979
    • RE: How many guys have you ever had sex with in a day

      4.  Had a 4some with 3 others, then came home, called another fuckbuddy, went ut and got fucked again.

      posted in Sex & Relationships
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      pjbf1979
    • RE: Where is the best place to shoot your load/cum?

      @Flinxxx:

      Pulling out is for porn

      ech no.  I want cream pies in porn too.  It's a turn off when a guy wastes his cum by not shooting inside.

      posted in Sex & Relationships
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      pjbf1979
    • RE: Homewrecker??

      @rickydrexel:

      I am a person who honestly sees nothing wrong with sleeping with a married person or someone in a relationship. I never persue anyone, but if they come at me, i don't turn them down either. Atleast if i'm attracted to them. Am I a homewrecker?

      I've fucked married guys.  I won't set out to seduce them, but if they're wandering, I'll go for it.  If they're looking, and they're willing to fuck around, then there are other problems in the home that I have nothing to do with.

      In that case, if any one is a homewrecker, it's him, not you.

      posted in Sex & Relationships
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      pjbf1979
    • RE: Is it moral for a gay to marry with a woman under social pressure?

      It's not a black and white issue.  The thing with evaluating morality is that it's circumstantial.  Most will agree that murder is wrong.  But murdering someone in legitimate self-defence is morally acceptable, and even expected.  There are many factors that are to be considered when determining morality.

      Does she know he's gay?  If no, then perhaps it is not.  But even then: is his life, well being, and/or freedom at stake if he tells her and/or does not marry?  If this is the case, then an argument can easily be made that she ought not be told, and he should marry her.  It's easy for most westerners to judge, forgetting that there are still many places where being gay is an automatic prison or death sentence and not marrying brings great suspicion.  This one reason many gay men ended up in the clergy not so very long ago (and even today, really).  Seminary was an acceptable reason to not marry, without arousing suspicion.

      If she does know he's gay, and there's an agreement between them, there is no problem.  Such marriages were not uncommon when my father (67 now) was in school, in the 60s–especially if she were lesbian.  I think there's even a term for this, but I can't find it.

      Morality is dynamic, as well.  It's based on social norms, which change over time.  In the early 19th century, it was immoral for a woman to let her ears show.  less than 100 years later, she could show her ears, but not her ankles.  Within 30 years, we were in the Flapper era.  Grandmothers were utterly aghast at what their grandchildren were wearing (or, in their minds, NOT wearing).

      I know that seems off topic, but it's to illustrate that morality shifts--often very quickly, within one generation.

      posted in Sex & Relationships
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      pjbf1979
    • RE: Are you attracted to transgender people?

      @zeropolis79:

      I'll admit I have a friend on Facebook who is a MtF transgender who has gone through most of the ops but has the obvious look of a male to him/her and I think I'd like to fuck him/her if they weren't already taken..

      (I won't share a photo as the person is a good friend)

      As a transperson, I'd like to weigh in on your wording here.  I know there's no tone on the internet, so let me clarify that I'm not trying to be a dick; quite the opposite.

      As a MtF, most likely your friend's pronoun is feminine.  Regardless, using him/her (and likewise he/she) is offensive, even if unintentionally so (I've known people who thought they were being inclusive with the term).  It may not offend your friend (I certainly can't speak for them) but it may, and they just don't know how to say that they're offended or hurt (I have this situation with some lifelong friends).

      If you're unsure which pronoun to use (not just with your friend but anyone in general), defaulting to the neutral they/them is a safe bet.

      posted in Sex & Relationships
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      pjbf1979
    • RE: Are you attracted to transgender people?

      This thread gives me much hope.  I'm FtM (femmeboi is my current label of choice, though I have many) and I've honestly despaired of having sex again, much less having a relationship.

      posted in Sex & Relationships
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      pjbf1979
    • RE: Are you attracted to transgender people?

      @hhsq:

      I'm scared to say that I'm not… nowadays everything that you say can be used against you. People call me transphobic and genitalist because I wouldn't have sex with a trans person, but the fact is that I like the male body and I like cock. I'm not sexually atractedby female bodies, and even though I think a male trans body beautifull I will miss the cock when it comes to sex. Is it wrong? If so, how is it any different from discriminating any other sexual preferences?

      As an FtM transmasculine person, I have no problem with your feelings.  If you were an asshole about transpeople, I'd have an issue. But people are attracted to what/whom they're attracted.  You're not racist if you're not sexually attracted to black people.  You're not transphobic if you're not attracted to transpeople.

      I'm not attracted to fat people.  Doesn't mean I hate them, nor that I'm self-loathing (I'm fat).

      There will be people who hate on you for your attraction or lack thereof.  But fuck em.  Or rather tell them to fuck themselves  ;D

      posted in Sex & Relationships
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      pjbf1979
    • RE: How big is your porn folder?

      Only 95.6 Gb.  I'm such an amateur  :cry2:

      posted in Chit Chat
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      pjbf1979
    • RE: How many men you have had sex with so far?

      I stopped officially counting after 75.  I THINK I'm at around 93.

      I want to hit 100 before I'm 40–I have not-quite 3 years to accomplish that.

      posted in Sex & Relationships
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      pjbf1979
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