@PetShopBoys:
If you ask me, most relationships fail because one or both people develop a sense of complacency. During the courtship phase and in the beginning stages of the relationship, everything is sunshine and rainbows. The sex is great, the conversation is great, and you just think you're meant for each other. Inevitably, the ebb and flow kicks in and you become more comfortable with each other. You find out what annoys you about the other person. You fight. You may even wonder, "What am I doing with this person?"
Keeping things hot, to me, lies in never getting complacent, always staying on top of your game, always showing your man that you're the person he fell in love with. Think of relationships like a flower (I know, I know, cue Selena's "Como La Flor). When you stay on top of it, give it what it needs, nourish and love it, it can last for a very, very long time. But the second you start to ignore it, it wilts and eventually dies, and there will be nothing you can do to bring it back.
As for the sexual side of things, that just comes with the territory of everything else I've mentioned above. When you keep that spark alive, the sex is natural and it doesn't feel like something you have to do. You see him after a long day at work and all you can think is, "God DAMN, I want him right now!"
All in all, keep at it. Don't slip up. Don't neglect things. Don't let your flower wilt.
I 100% agree with this.
I lost interest in some of my ex boyfriends because of their attitude, it got to the point where seeing them made me more nervous than happy because I was just expecting when will some shit happen again - and it always happened, you just realise how some people are and that they'll never even try to change. The worst thing is when they know what bothers you, and they even admit that some thing they're doing are wrong, but they still only think about themselves and do it anyway.
I'm not saying you should totally change to the point that you don't even recognize yourself, but if you want to live with somebody you obviously have to do some adjustments, you can't expect that everybody should only adjust to you and tolerate the way you are. But unfortunately, so many people are really selfish and want to live like they're single but also have a bf at the same time - it doesn't work that way.
You just have to keep trying, and I don't mean anything special, just some small gestures to make your man feel important and wanted and believe me - he'll want you too.
But also don't be too clingy, you also need to give another person some space, because if he feels suffocated by you - he'll lose interest.
There needs to be a balance - both persons need the same amount of giving and recieving. Sometimes you'll get your way, sometimes it will be the other person, but when you sum it all up it should be balanced.
Basically - don't be selfish and don't be with somebody who is, it simply won't work.
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