There are all kinds of relationships.
They are all voluntary.
If you don't want to be involved with someone that is not monogamous, then it looks like you found the wrong guy.
If you can live with him being polyamorous, then keep going.
Don't let others tell you what to do. It's your relationship, and your choice.
Only you can make it, and only you have to live with that decision.
Oh and yeah, get tested.
Poppers aren't just one thing, which is the confusion.
They are a class of chemicals, that are an alcohol bonded to a nitrite.
Amyl is a pentanol + nitrite. It's very stable, and will often be included emergency kits as an ampule. It's used for treating cyanide poisoning, and angina, and as a medically classified thing it's controlled, so you can't find it in the US.
Most of what you find in the US is butyl nitrite and/or isopropyl nitrite. Some brand are blends. They are not as stable as amyl, and start to decompose immediately at room temperature, leading to a smell that can burn your nose/throat. Butyl breaks down slower than isopropyl because its a longer chain.
Long story short, they all work the same way. You inhale it, your body breaks it back down, and you get high. The reaction to make it is very simple, and making a "pure" product is also very easy, because it floats out of he water.
So, when you're shopping for poppers, more than the "brand" what you should be looking for is how old it is. You want to find the newest stuff you can, because it does start to break down immediately at room temp.
That being said there's a couple of things you can do to make it store longer.
Hmm… maybe a little chemistry lesson is needed here.
Poppers are nitrited alcohols They all work the same way. You inhale them, and then they re-break into the alcohol and the gas in your bloodstream. You get high off the gas part, and then your body has to break down the alcohol part.
amyl uses a 5 carbon alcohol
butyl uses a 4 carbon alcohol
isopropyl uses a 3 carbon alcohol
ethyl is 2 carbon
methyl is 1 carbon.
The longer the chain, the more stable it is when it's a popper. 2 and 1 carbon poppers are not liquid at room temp, so I have some doubts about going blind as a real thing, because that's a methyl alcohol issue. If you ingest wood grain alcohol, your liver turns it into a kinda formaldehyde that can pickle your optic nerves which is why it can make you blind. But poppers in a bottle shouldn't be able to have a nitrated methanol, so the only way it would be in there is if some dumb ass put methyl alcohol in the mix for no good reason after the poppers were made.
So. maybe we should understand how you make poppers.
It's a very simple thing.
You take an acid, mix it with water, chill it with ice, and then stir in the alcohol. Then you mix in sodium nitrite (used for bio diesel, and meat preservation) The acid breaks the sodium nitrite into nitric oxide gas, which then bonds to the alcohol, and then it floats to the top. You skim off the stuff on the top, and you've got poppers. It's about as difficult as making a cake. All the ingredients are legal, and you can get them on amazon, except pentanol, which is 5 carbon and used to make amyl. That stuff.. I've never been able to find outside a controlled chemical supplier.
Anyway, that leaves isopropyl(yes.. rubbing alcohol) and isobutyl as the ones easy to get.
Most poppers are one or the other because it's just easier. Although some mix. Amyl(5 carbon from pentanol) is a controlled substance and is included in some emergency kits and is treated as a medicine.
What you experience as differences.. is usually not really a difference in how it was made. Because the poppers float in water, the purity ends up being very high because the ingredients are so simple.
They end up seeming different because they start to break down as soon as they are made, and as they break down more, they smell different depending on how much nitric oxide and alcohol it has reverted to. That's why the "fresh" is important, and why when you get a new bottle it's different than when you're at the end of the bottle, or you kept it too long.
There's a couple things you can do to make it last longer.
Wait…. wasn't that an episode of TrueBlood?
Get a dildo, and try different positions, also will loosen you up.
Riding gives you more control but gravity is also pulling your innards down.
Lying down relieves some of that, and having your hips elevated can also help.
But.. most of the trick is relaxing your sphincter to get it in.
So comfort is important.
I think a patient/experienced top is more important than the actual position.
Even if you popper up, if he goes too fast and you don't loosen up you're going to be uncomfortable, and maybe clench.
Yes.
You can be friends with an ex.
Sometimes.
Not every relationship ends with insurmountable baggage.
Sometimes things just don't work out and you're not both assholes, so yeah… you can be friends.
Other times.. there's too much baggage.
It's not alot different than divorce.
Sometimes the people can stay civil and be friends, and sometimes they want to shoot on sight.
It depends on what you mean by bottom.
If you mean someone that enjoys being penetrated, then that's not really a problem.
There's lots of things that can be done to cover that need.
The problem is if one partner is strictly passive/submissive.
Then the other one doesn't "get done", and they'll be unsatisfied.
Obviously you don't need a penis to have sex.
There's lots of satisfied lesbians.
The problem is if nobody is willing to drive the car, you end up not going anywhere.
A new car is only new for so long.
After that, all it can be is a good car.
For some people, that's not enough, and they'll look for new cars because their looking for excitement of "new".
The thing is, you can't bring back new.
What I'm saying is it's probably not really you.
Your partner may think he's "had" you and is bored.
Maybe introduce something different.
You could try role play, to simulate being someone new.
Or you could try to introduce something you haven't tried before, like toys.
Or for some people, it's a setting. So, maybe try sex in different places, like go on a trip, or rent a hotel room.
Maybe suggest trying something he hasn't tried before, or asking if there's something he's wanted to try but hasn't.
Interest is different for everyone. All you can do is try to figure out how to keep it interesting.
It would be nice to say, "just do this thing" and everything will work out, but life doesn't work that way.
It may be that his fetish, is "new" as it is with many guys, and there may be nothing you can do about it.
