The dark back room of a bar is not necessarily a precursor to LTR, and at least at online hookup sites, those who claim to be interested in conversation seem to be lying and really mean "conversation with someone who would be totally hot and sexually desirable even if they had the discussion skills and insights of a Kardassian."
When I was discovering sex in the pre-plague years, one of the first things I learned from a gay contemporary was that the tubs are better than gay bars "because you meet a better class of people." He also told me reassuringly that no, not everyone could tell my secret shame"
Straights are so naive." Obviously that info as as dated as segregated lunch counters (anyone else old enough to remember lunch counters? Every "five and dime" store used to have one. (Five and…? Oh, never mind.)
Whether those views were ever correct, they certainly helped me survive the most confused period of my life.