[Grindr, Pics attached] What am I doing wrong!? Can't get laid.
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Please believe me when I say, I am not fishing for compliments or assurances! Rather, the purpose of my post is more pragmatic.
I live in downtown NYC. Every 4 months, I get into a weird zone where I NEED to be fucked. I normally do not hook up with people at all, and just get by with jerking off 2-3 times a day.
When I'm in that once-every-4-months thirst craze, the photos attached to this post are the photos I send to grindr profiles that I would like to hookup with.And I NEVER. SUCCEED!?
Going back to the opening of this post: it is very clear that what I am doing is not working.
I think of myself as an attractive enough person. I go to the gym a lot, and have a balanced physique (I never skip leg days. In fact, my legs are a bit over-developed from ballet).
I don't take selfies (my facebook is almost empty), and am not good at taking photography. So is that what it is?What am I doing wrong?
When sending a message to someone, I generally say:
"How's it going. (Name) here. Looking?"
And proceed to send those photos.My profile reads:
"We all have needs.
Tastes vary wildly depending on mood. Power bttm if it comes to it. Open to most things.
Sex as the mean or end.
Even deep depths have a shallow layer."I've been told by previous sex partners, that I am weird. Straightup, people have said that "You are weird" after we've had sex. Okay, I get it. I ask strange questions and am sometimes a bit aloof. But that's not what I'm talking about here. I'm not looking for dates or Boyfriends.
We all have needs. Come on, when you're on Grindr at midnight on the weekends in NYC, you're looking to fuck. So why not straight to the point?
Am I presenting myself as a slut? Are my photos unideal? Am I not as fit as I like to think?
Would appreciate any feedback, as this is driving me insane! I really don't want to have to resort to using my vibrating dildo tonight…
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I think the problem is that big gray oval you have over your face. If I saw someone with a big oval on their face, I would think they were weird!
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Lol…
I put that grey circle there for the purpose of posting it here, but send the photos without it on grindr
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Grinder pics and porn for many relieve the need for physical sex as they can jerk off and fantasise over them and then get on with their lives. By sending people pictures of your ass or cock there is nothing left to find out so they can wank off and no need to meet. Personally I find dating apps mostly a waste of time and get most sex meeting people physically. Saunas offer the best option for quick sex as everyone there is there for the same purpose. If you really must use apps then "less is more", don't show your cock or ass and if you must then obscure it so its teasing. Keep your shorts on with hard on etc. Your face pics are very much like everyone elses so try to be different here too and less pics, one or two are enough. Give little and you will get back lots. Good luck
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If I were in Manhattan the same time you happened to be "in heat", I'd fuck you… although I use Manhunt rather than Gringr...
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Grinder pics and porn for many relieve the need for physical sex as they can jerk off and fantasise over them and then get on with their lives. By sending people pictures of your ass or cock there is nothing left to find out so they can wank off and no need to meet. Personally I find dating apps mostly a waste of time and get most sex meeting people physically. Saunas offer the best option for quick sex as everyone there is there for the same purpose. If you really must use apps then "less is more", don't show your cock or ass and if you must then obscure it so its teasing. Keep your shorts on with hard on etc. Your face pics are very much like everyone elses so try to be different here too and less pics, one or two are enough. Give little and you will get back lots. Good luck
Thank you. Didn't think about this - Apparently fake photos are a thing, so I was projecting what I would want: to know what I'm getting. I will definitely give this a try.
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If I were in Manhattan the same time you happened to be "in heat", I'd fuck you… although I use Manhunt rather than Gringr...
Oh shit, didn't know Manhunt was still alive. Been years for me. Thank you, will look into it again.
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Oh fuck, I totally feel for you about "Every 4 months, I get into a weird zone where I NEED to be fucked."
I'm inflicted with that insatiable constant craving every few months too.
Just couldn't get on with normal routines till I do naughty things
to get it out of my system.
Things that I wouldn't want friends to know…"you did WHAT!!" :afr: -
Adam4Adam works well too….its been poppin lately....
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I would say trying a torso pic - maybe your outfit isn't popping like you want. I usually look for variety - experiment with different lighting. Try more angles and try to enhance your assets. Just out of left field, it could be that the guys you hook up with are douche-bags or racist. Even if you are 'weird' in all actuality, I wouldn't say that to your face out of courtesy; that's a dick move making you feel less of yourself. Hopefully you have better luck.
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I'm surprised no one has mentioned Scruff. It's one of my favorites.
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Do they ask if you're effeminate or not? Maybe they have a preference.
Yeah, it's kinda easier to hook up in a bath house or sauna but also risky.
Man, I need to work out again.
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Well, I think there's one big oversight here, and it's that your Asian. And you're more than likely hitting up white guys exclusively and that's why you're not getting laid…because they're not interested. If you're only into white guys, then tough luck, you're gonna have a hard time. In the gay/bi community, most white guys just aren't into Asians. But, if you're into others, try seeking them out and maybe you'll get lucky.
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Downtown NYC encompasses a lot of space/neighborhoods. So I don't know exactly where you're at. Still, go to The Cock or the parties on 38th Street, dude. You'll get laid like that (snaps). And assuming you don't have four roommates, you probably have some $ if you're living downtown. So buy yourself an escort. You can definitely afford one every 4 months.
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Dude, maybe cubtellak is right. Or maybe you're hitting justa a very specific type og guys and - bad luck - you're not the type of that type. You seem very fuckabel to me!
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I have to add to the point of a poster above, if you are only into white men you are kinda fucked. People tend to like either either own race exclusively or white guys. I am black tend to prefer Asians and run into a very similar problem. So i just move on to next race ;D
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Man! Downtown of NYC! It must be competitive since there are loads of hot guys and maybe you are not hot enough.
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ive used grindr for a while and i will say u live in a wayyy bigger area then i do. im in a small town where most of the gays know each other and or have slept with each other. but no issues with grindr hookup sense that is what most use it for. most have given u good advice already. from what i see in the pics youre a good looking dude with a great physique so thats not the problem at all. most gays arent as shallow as they claim when it comes to hookups. however most do have a type. one part is saying your a power bottom may intimidate some but not all it would just cut u off to a good bit of tops who can most likely fuck great but are worried it wont turn out good so they go with another guy. when u do send pics i would just say just send your face maybe body but no ass or cock because like someone else said they could just jerk to your pics. im not sure how youre conversation goes in the chat after your greeting but if u keep it geared only to sex or describing yourself sexually that should be good. if u can get in his head and make him imagine fucking u your most likely gonna get fucked lol :). i saw someone said they use manhunt for looking to. i would say even try another site. there is adam4adam to. but i would say grindr should work for u. well anyway hopefully i helped u in some way and i just wanna add im 27 but all my friends have always said i give the best advice for any and everything. but good luck and hope GREAT fuck for u.
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Your problem is that you're on Grindr. Social Media doesn't work.
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I thought the ass pics were on point, though.
