No Erection When Getting Anal Fucked

[equinox8888]

Hello guys, I have registered couple of month before(and have downloaded lot of stuff hehe) and this is my first forum post.
I'm really confused and not sure about lot of stuff, so I hoping that in opening up this thread I will find answers.
I'm almost 20 years old, with my first gay (and bottom) expirience was when i was 15.5. I never tried to Top, niether I ever wanted to, even before I ever bottomed I had the feeling I want it inside of me.
The first time was wierd, but not painful or unpainful, as his dick was (compare to the next ones at least) thin. Afterwards it really varied, most of the times it was hurt, sometimes not, it was depending on my position, if he was rimming me before. I have a sum of 9 times a guy top me along those 5 years, as I don't do lot of sex, unfortunatley. Somehow I came into some assumptions, I don't know which of them is true or not, I want to try and clear for myself those things.

First of all, I'm getting no erection when a guy fucks me. It's not bothering me but, well, I'm not really enjoy the penetration either. I do want to enjoy it, I enjoy sucking and enjoy thinking that I make this hot guy feel pleasure from "using/fucking" me. I remember that when a guy rimmed my ass before fucking me, it was less hurt, as it was calming me(I like getting rimmed lol).
Also, last time I have got fucked, I tried to calm myself and also moan when he fucked me, it actually worked but I was actually a bit shy to moan suddenly when I wasn't used to it(haha). Somehow the fact I moaned made the pain dissapear and I suddenly felt like energy flowing into me every time he entered his dick inside**(was it what you call "anal orgasm"?)** however I also wanted him to stop, but I don't know if it was becuase I was unused to the feeling, or because of another feeling, a wierd one, that I feel wanting to go to the tiolet even though I'm super clean, like, when someone penetrate me I have the feeling it needs to get out, then I go to toilet and nothing, just the uneasy feeling with nothing.
In addition, I suffered before one year from fissure, however the doctor checked me after a treatment and said it have been cured since. I wonder if it has any effects, even though it already have been cured.

So, with all those thoughts running in my brain, plus reading the book "how to bottom like a porn star" which gave me a bit of light, I'd like to hear what you think about the assumptions, if they are wrong and questions I got:

• In order to feel no pain, I need to relax first, and for example rimming that makes me feel good makes me relax so maybe that's an explenation to why it was less hurt when someone did that before fucking me. Is it true that relaxtion leads to less hurt when someone pentrates you? does moaning have any connection to it?

• Does the fact I don't have erection when a guy fucking me is bad? When I use fingers it does keeps on hard, this why i'm asking. Plus, does tops generally think of unhard dick of the bottom as not-sexy? or its varey?

• How the feeling of wanting to go to toilet can dissapear? It makes me not wanting to continue the fucking process.

• Can it be the fault of the top that its hurt? as some may tell me "He just don't know how to fuck", plus with some guys I did the same preperation and all, even same position, but one was hurting like hell and one almost didn't(their dick sized wasn't matter).

• Is there's a possibility that I just need to abandon the penetration part in my life and do only oral?

• Does what I felt**(described above)** was an anal orgasm?

Sorry for the tons of quetions, those were some that I always wanted to ask but didn't know where I can to actually do that.
Also, really sorry about my english, it's not my first language but I've tried my best so you will understand me

[cammikun]

Well, first, if it hurts stop. Bottoming should be a pleasant experience or at the minimum a non-painful one.
Second, you didn't mention lube. Are you using a lubricant? I recommend the silicone-based ones for only one reason. They don't dry out. But if you're using condoms, the water-based ones are just as good. You just need to use more water-based lube and use it a lot more. Like every 5 minutes.
Don't be afraid to take a break if it feels uncomfortable. You don't even have to tell your partner. Just mix it up. Have him pull out and start sucking him while you pull his nipples or massage behind his balls.
Get a dildo, carrot, cucumber, or someone's finger and put a condom on it. Try jacking off while the dildo is in you. Practice makes perfect and it helps get your butt accustomed to more action.
If you haven't bottomed alot, (nine times in five years?) it is not like riding a bicycle. (i.e. You never forget how to ride a bicycle) It is more like training for a marathon, every day you try for a little longer and a little further.
But most important, if it hurts, stop. You wouldn't continue burning your finger in a fire, would you? Well don't continue fucking when you are in pain. I don't care how hot the guy is.
Not sure about an anal orgasm, but when the sex is good and fun, bottoming can be a lot of fun, too!

[Blkdragon84]

Hows it going equinox, I'll take a shot at answering a few of your questions.

1.  Relaxing first definitely helps to make bottoming more comfortable.  If its painful and you don't like it, don't go through with it.  Getting rimmed first helps a lot.  I always try to rim before penetration.  Another thing to consider is make sure you use plenty of lube.  Lube is your friend, you can never use too much.

2. Not having an erection while being fucked isn't really that unusual.  Some guys just don't get hard when they are bottoming.  Even if they get hard from fingering, rimming, or toys.  Sometimes its just because you're focused more on bottoming and the sensations that you're feeling to get an erection.  It's perfectly natural and most guys won't mind at all that you don't get hard as long as they know you're having fun.

4. It could be that fault of the top that it hurt.  Like I said, make sure you're comfortable, relaxed and use plenty of lube.  If a guy is obviously hurting you, don't pretend he's not.  Take a break, do some foreplay for a while, lube up and try again and see if its better.

5.  I wouldn't give up on bottoming just yet.  Try to take it slow and figure out what makes it more enjoyable for you.  But oral is still fun until you figure that out, lol.

6.  What you described could very well have been an anal orgasm.  It probably happened because you were focusing on something other than hurting from getting fucked that time, I'd imagine.  If its always kinda hurt when you got fucked before, then you're probably focused on that feeling, which makes you clench down unconsciously….that just makes it worse.  But when you were focused on something else...especially since you were trying something that you don't usually do (the moaning) then your mind may have wondered a little letting you enjoy bottoming more than usual.

I hope I answered your questions and helped you out.  btw, I skipped 3 on purpose because I don't know what to tell you about that one but I'm sure somebody else will add there opinion on what you can do

[hhsq]

I suggest you take a look at this other topic. There are some good tips too:

https://forum.gaytorrent.ru/index.php?topic=31877.0

[cosmicjester]

when i first stared to bottom i didn't get hard, but when i started to enjoy as I did it more I got erections.

[jonas32]

@equinox8888:

Hello guys, I have registered couple of month before(and have downloaded lot of stuff hehe) and this is my first forum post.
I'm really confused and not sure about lot of stuff, so I hoping that in opening up this thread I will find answers.
I'm almost 20 years old, with my first gay (and bottom) expirience was when i was 15.5. I never tried to Top, niether I ever wanted to, even before I ever bottomed I had the feeling I want it inside of me.
The first time was wierd, but not painful or unpainful, as his dick was (compare to the next ones at least) thin. Afterwards it really varied, most of the times it was hurt, sometimes not, it was depending on my position, if he was rimming me before. I have a sum of 9 times a guy top me along those 5 years, as I don't do lot of sex, unfortunatley. Somehow I came into some assumptions, I don't know which of them is true or not, I want to try and clear for myself those things.

First of all, I'm getting no erection when a guy fucks me. It's not bothering me but, well, I'm not really enjoy the penetration either. I do want to enjoy it, I enjoy sucking and enjoy thinking that I make this hot guy feel pleasure from "using/fucking" me. I remember that when a guy rimmed my ass before fucking me, it was less hurt, as it was calming me(I like getting rimmed lol).
Also, last time I have got fucked, I tried to calm myself and also moan when he fucked me, it actually worked but I was actually a bit shy to moan suddenly when I wasn't used to it(haha). Somehow the fact I moaned made the pain dissapear and I suddenly felt like energy flowing into me every time he entered his dick inside**(was it what you call "anal orgasm"?)** however I also wanted him to stop, but I don't know if it was becuase I was unused to the feeling, or because of another feeling, a wierd one, that I feel wanting to go to the tiolet even though I'm super clean, like, when someone penetrate me I have the feeling it needs to get out, then I go to toilet and nothing, just the uneasy feeling with nothing.
In addition, I suffered before one year from fissure, however the doctor checked me after a treatment and said it have been cured since. I wonder if it has any effects, even though it already have been cured.

So, with all those thoughts running in my brain, plus reading the book "how to bottom like a porn star" which gave me a bit of light, I'd like to hear what you think about the assumptions, if they are wrong and questions I got:

• In order to feel no pain, I need to relax first, and for example rimming that makes me feel good makes me relax so maybe that's an explenation to why it was less hurt when someone did that before fucking me. Is it true that relaxtion leads to less hurt when someone pentrates you? does moaning have any connection to it?

• Does the fact I don't have erection when a guy fucking me is bad? When I use fingers it does keeps on hard, this why i'm asking. Plus, does tops generally think of unhard dick of the bottom as not-sexy? or its varey?

• How the feeling of wanting to go to toilet can dissapear? It makes me not wanting to continue the fucking process.

• Can it be the fault of the top that its hurt? as some may tell me "He just don't know how to fuck", plus with some guys I did the same preperation and all, even same position, but one was hurting like hell and one almost didn't(their dick sized wasn't matter).

• Is there's a possibility that I just need to abandon the penetration part in my life and do only oral?

• Does what I felt**(described above)** was an anal orgasm?

Sorry for the tons of quetions, those were some that I always wanted to ask but didn't know where I can to actually do that.
Also, really sorry about my english, it's not my first language but I've tried my best so you will understand me

My husband and i has been together since 1993. Im 100% bottom, never want to top. Yes, it does hurt sometimes if his to rough or horny. But its only the beginning. He have pleny of precum so nowdays we seldom use lubricant. I often gets hard when he fucks, but not always. I think it has something to do with the stimulate of the prostate.

I think rimming its the same for a women to get licked. I love it. I also love to rim.

An anal orgasm for me, its as something explodes inside me and yes i cum hands free when

[bktony]

I had the same thoughts before I had my first anal orgasm and it was actually my top who told me to embrace it and let it happen… it does feel like you have to go right before and sometimes as a bottom that feeling can be unnerving but if you are confident in your hygiene go with it and ride that wave... IT IS GREAT!!!!

as far as it hurting  might just be you tensing because you are scared... if rimming relaxes you make it mandatory for your partner. make it one of the things you discuss before he/you even get there. but it should only hurt briefly in the beginning at most... but if you dont relax you are only hurting yourself and most likely its in your mind

I rarely get erections while bottoming and Ive honestly only had a few tops ask if i was enjoying the sex but just tell them that your focus is on your ass and thats is where your pleasure comes from while bottoming and they are usually ok with that but I on the other hand cream a lot, moan and have multiple anal orgasms so thats evidence I am enjoying myself.

yes it could be the fault of the top but I found that when I told them i was tense before hand they are more caring and try to relax me so it doesnt hurt as much... some have massaged me, some have kissed me, some have taken it slowly and made it hurt a lot less.. communication is key

[homeboy2403]

Well not getting an erection while getting fucked is totally normal. Even in some porn movies guys bottoming R not erect.