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    Are you the man or the woman in the relationship?

    Sex & Relationships
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    • S
      spam17 last edited by

      Just days after he came out, Olympian Gus Kenworthy was asked a question many gay and lesbian people dread on Twitter by a random user.

      Kenworthy handled it so well that I can't think of a more perfect way to respond to such a cringeworthy inquiry..

      "Are you the man or the woman in the relationship? That's all I need to know right now," the user wrote.

      Kenworthy, 24, followed up with:

      "In a relationship I am the man. As is the other man. I'm gay. Not trying to emulate a heterosexual relationship."

      !

      What would you answer -privately or publicaly- to a such question?

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      • Ralf
        Ralf last edited by

        Roles imposed by society . I'm gay , indentifico me as a man , if my ta partner mbém it identifies as one, there is no woman in the relationship …. People tend to think that the liability is the woman in the relationship ... silly ... passive men are as men and other men

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        • D
          danijelr15 last edited by

          @Ralf:

          passive men are as men and other men

          No, they are women and so is Gus Kenworthy.

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          • Ralf
            Ralf last edited by

            @danijelr15:

            @Ralf:

            passive men are as men and other men

            No, they are women and so is Gus Kenworthy.

            LOL LOL LOL
            if you are passive , then you are the woman of the relationship ?

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            • MrMazda
              MrMazda Global Moderator last edited by

              I'm not sure how you would classify me…. We're both kinda dominant in our own ways and which one is the pitcher and which one is the catcher entirely depends on our mood... How would you classify that?

              Whap The User
              The only difference between martyrdom and suicide is press coverage!

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              • Ralf
                Ralf last edited by

                @MrMazda:

                I'm not sure how you would classify me…. We're both kinda dominant in our own ways and which one is the pitcher and which one is the catcher entirely depends on our mood... How would you classify that?

                As two people who enjoy  🙂 🙂 🙂 :crazy2: :love: THE END

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                • 2
                  21mapple last edited by

                  Man

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                  • H
                    hhsq last edited by

                    That question is so annoying…

                    http://hotgayfuzz.tumblr.com/

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                    • 2222
                      2222 Moderator last edited by

                      Out of topic, just realize that Gus Kenworthy is really hot! He's cuter than Jerry Mouse!

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                      • 36605domtop
                        36605domtop last edited by

                        @spam17:

                        "Are you the man or the woman in the relationship? That's all I need to know right now," the user wrote.

                        Kenworthy, 24, followed up with:

                        "In a relationship I am the man. As is the other man. I'm gay. Not trying to emulate a heterosexual relationship."

                        This totally is an annoying question.  I really like the answer given though.  I will use that answer in the future myself.  There is nothing worse than when actually family members something like this.  It's so awkward.

                        Have you serviced your Dom today?

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                        • S
                          spam17 last edited by

                          @36605domtop:

                          @spam17:

                          "Are you the man or the woman in the relationship? That's all I need to know right now," the user wrote.

                          Kenworthy, 24, followed up with:

                          "In a relationship I am the man. As is the other man. I'm gay. Not trying to emulate a heterosexual relationship."

                          This totally is an annoying question.  I really like the answer given though.  I will use that answer in the future myself.  There is nothing worse than when actually family members something like this.  It's so awkward.

                          I guess that you forgot typing the word "ask"..

                          Something like this would sound complete:

                          "There is nothing worse than when actually family members ask something like this."

                          Am I correct?

                          😉

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                          • WackyRabbit
                            WackyRabbit last edited by

                            :fight: This is one question that really gets under my skin. I am a man and my partner is a man, there is no woman in our relationship.

                            Remember me with smiles and laughter
                            For that's how I will remember you all
                            For if you can only remember with tears
                            Then please don't remember me at all.

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                            • H
                              hhsq last edited by

                              Apparently there's someone here who do believe there should be a "man" and a "woman" in a gay relationship, as this person has thumbed down all the coments in which people expressed not being ok with that kind of ignorant question.

                              http://hotgayfuzz.tumblr.com/

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                              • D
                                deflorare last edited by

                                I think that what people mean when they ask a question like that is 'Who is dominant and who is submissive in your relationship?' But when using 'male' and 'female' instead, it doesn't make any sense. In some relationships,  females are dominant and men are submissive.

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                                • I
                                  instantfuck last edited by

                                  Unlike so many in this thread, I don't think the question is inappropriate at all in its nature.  I absolutely understand where some of the descent is coming from; and wouldn't be surprised if the demographic of those responses held to the older respondents.  Back in the day (when I wasn't so gray around the edges) such a question was usually posed to a gay friend by some well-intentioned, but under-informed straight person that truly had no idea at all what a gay relationship truly was.  It was–especially back then--incomprehensible that a gay relationship could be no different than that of our straight counterpart.

                                  I also think a lot of the response here--specifically those aghast by the implication that one of the participants is 'not' a man is likely somewhat of an overcompensation by a mostly younger demographic that haven't yet fully realized their own place in the world.

                                  I for one can answer that I am very much the one taking the 'woman's' role in relationships.  Labeling the roles by gender is probably not the most effective way to have posed the question, but I don't think it's as absurd as many do.  I don't think it would be possible for me to be any more 'manly' than I already am.  Where gender stereotypes are concerned I likely fit most every one, right down to watching football on Sunday afternoons after spending my Saturday dicking around under the hood of whatever neighbor's car needed a little tweaking under the hood.

                                  In my relationships (and I mean all of them) however, I very much take on the passive, care-taking role; or if you insist, the role of the woman.  I'm the one that keeps the house running and clean, I'm the one that cooks and does the laundry and in no uncertain terms, he (whoever he may be) is the one that's going to take out the trash, hang the Christmas lights and...most importantly...kill every spider that ever crosses my path!!!

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                                  • raphjd
                                    raphjd Forum Administrator last edited by

                                    @ Instantfuck

                                    While I understand and to a tiny degree, agree with you, you still can't really say that there is a "man" or "woman" role in relationships.

                                    Relationship roles haven't been fixed since the mid 1960s.  Lot's of men have done the cooking (and other household chores) even though the useless wife laid around watching her "stories".

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                                    • A
                                      Aleedinver last edited by

                                      I don't think there must be a man or a woman in a gay relationship. When I seek for a man I want someone that has a man body, when I seek for a woman I want a feminine body, but I either don't want a caveman or a drag queen for the first or a truck driver or a bitch for the second… there is a middle way I hope and I enjoy when someone is not at the extreme side...

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                                      • ColinTNM
                                        ColinTNM last edited by

                                        Some people just really are this stupid, it's true.

                                        it's the ultimate heterosexual narcissism, they see the world in black and white so everything is this or that, on or off, 0 or 1.

                                        That's why we have a RAINBOW flag as symbol of diversity.

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                                        • O
                                          orberon2 last edited by

                                          Oh, please what they really want to know is who's the fucker (man) and who gets fucked (woman)

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                                          • ColinTNM
                                            ColinTNM last edited by

                                            @orberon2:

                                            Oh, please what they really want to know is who's the fucker (man) and who gets fucked (woman)

                                            of course that's what they're asking. but as I said above it's a reflection of their own narcissism and narrow-mindedness that gay sex is as static and binary as their own.

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