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    Is monogamy and life long relationship becoming the norm now?

    Sex & Relationships
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    • N
      no2shallow last edited by

      :love: :hug2:

      Monogamy and long term relationship :hug: is on the rise after youtube launched several videos that prescribe monogamy and love.

      Have most of us got into such great relationship already?
      :love:

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      • N
        no2shallow last edited by

        😘

        What are your views about long term relationship with a guy for the whole life?

        Please contribute your valuable suggestions here.

        :laugh:

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        • J
          jonas32 last edited by

          My husband and i have been together from about 1993. We are monogamus, but we do have threesomes from time to time.

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          • J
            jonas32 last edited by

            My husband and i have been together from about 1993. We are monogamus, but we do have threesomes from time to time.

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            • S
              Skelos last edited by

              I really end up leaving it up to the guy I'm with.  Married now and I'm still facing some of the nonsense I did with not being married.  Really a subjective matter to me.

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              • D
                deflorare last edited by

                @jonas32:

                My husband and i have been together from about 1993. We are monogamus, but we do have threesomes from time to time.

                Not really monogamous, then.

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                • L
                  loukou last edited by

                  I'm dating a guy for 6 months now ( my longest relationship believe me) but now I had this job thing and I had to move to another town for a month. He is visiting me time to time but it's killing me. Any tips !?

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                  • 4west
                    4west last edited by

                    I always hear complaints about "hookup culture" but I don't really believe people now are any more promiscuous than they were in the past. If monogamy and lifelong partnerships are becoming more common, I'd assume it's probably because of increased rights for LGBT people.

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                    • J
                      jonas32 last edited by

                      It depends on how you see it. We would never ever have sex with someone else it the other is not there. And we have only threesome with a older neighbour. So its not like we have threesomes with just anybody…..

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                      • raphjd
                        raphjd Forum Administrator last edited by

                        We've been together since 1994 and are monogamous (completely).    Sure, we've had our ups and downs, but we still love each other and are happy together.

                        It's always hardest after the honeymoon phase.  That's when things start getting real.   If you can work things out there, then you can have a long relationship.

                        EDIT:  Topics merged.

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                        • J
                          jonas32 last edited by

                          @deflorare:

                          @jonas32:

                          My husband and i have been together from about 1993. We are monogamus, but we do have threesomes from time to time.

                          Not really monogamous, then.

                          We are monogamus in our love to eatchother

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                          • H
                            hhsq last edited by

                            I think monogamy is somewhat overated. Not meaning it's a bad thing… It's just that it might not be the best thing for everyone, nor for every phase of one's life. There are many, many different ways to love someone.

                            http://hotgayfuzz.tumblr.com/

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                            • D
                              deflorare last edited by

                              I think monogamy is the most noble and beautiful way to love someone. It would break my heart if I could never experience that in my life.

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                              • MrMazda
                                MrMazda Global Moderator last edited by

                                Monogamy you say? But i always thought that Monogamy was just another piece of expensive wood lol

                                Whap The User
                                The only difference between martyrdom and suicide is press coverage!

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                                • ColinTNM
                                  ColinTNM last edited by

                                  Things are just balancing out. When homosexuality was illegal, anonymous casual sex was practically required so a man wouldn't be found out or be blackmailed. When homosexual acts between consenting adults were decriminalised there was a sense of freedom and a chance to differentiate a gay identity separately from a straight one (which was "the norm" of marriage, kids, monogamy etc)

                                  Now we are moving on past that, marriage is legal in many parts of the civilised world and people have more CHOICE to do what they want to do with their private lives without feeling pressured in to fitting in, whether that's pressure to conform to monogamy or playing the field.

                                  Monogamy is NOT trying to ape a straight lifestyle as many gay men have tried to call it in the past, some people of all persuasions want to develop a deep relationship with one other person, this isn't something exclusive to straight people, just like only wanting no strings random sex is not exclusively a gay thing either.

                                  Choice is always a good thing.

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                                  • I
                                    ILBear last edited by

                                    I met my first partner in 1978. We were monogamous the 20 years we were together before he passed away. My 2nd partner and I met in 1999 and too, were monogamous until he passed away last year. To me, if you're going to devote yourself to another man, you go all in. Sure, it's alright to look at someone else, just don't act.

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                                    • M
                                      MikeChang last edited by

                                      17 years and counting, no sign of it ending.  Our relationship isn't and never has been all about sex or how many men we can shag or be shagged by.  We have some things in common but also have our own interests, we have friends who aren't monogamous but that's fine and up too them.  Is it becoming the norm?  Not from what I've seen, there may be more people posting on youtube about there relationship especially with same sex marriage being legal and the in thing for those who would otherwise have just lived together long term without it.  But there are still plenty of men out there looking for nothing more than a one off, in fact if anything I would say it's less common as more and more "straight" men in relationships are trying out their "hetroflexible" side.  The saddest thing I've seen recently is about gay divorce,  why get married 3 month after meeting only to be divorced 3 months after that.

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                                      • L
                                        lostalone last edited by

                                        @ColinTNM:

                                        Things are just balancing out. When homosexuality was illegal, anonymous casual sex was practically required so a man wouldn't be found out or be blackmailed. When homosexual acts between consenting adults were decriminalised there was a sense of freedom and a chance to differentiate a gay identity separately from a straight one (which was "the norm" of marriage, kids, monogamy etc)

                                        Now we are moving on past that, marriage is legal in many parts of the civilised world and people have more CHOICE to do what they want to do with their private lives without feeling pressured in to fitting in, whether that's pressure to conform to monogamy or playing the field.

                                        Monogamy is NOT trying to ape a straight lifestyle as many gay men have tried to call it in the past, some people of all persuasions want to develop a deep relationship with one other person, this isn't something exclusive to straight people, just like only wanting no strings random sex is not exclusively a gay thing either.

                                        Choice is always a good thing.

                                        Agree, this.

                                        And I think the growing choice is expanding beyond the GLBTQ+ crowd– straight relationships have slowly but surely becoming more and more diverse; there are open relationships, polyamory, spouseswapping, etc, etc...

                                        I think ultimately it's a question of taste. Some works with complete monogamy. Others were fine with an exclusive relationship but a non-exclusive sexual relationship like jonas32 above. I myself cannot imagine myself being in a nonmonogamous relationship but since I've never been in a relationship before...no promises.

                                        Not to mention that like MikeChang said, there are more in a relationship than sex or sexual attraction.

                                        At the same time it is very possible that a lot of people are looking for a monogamous relationship because for a long time, even now, it's the one type of relationship that was taught around the most. It -has- been a norm if you look at the mainstream culture.

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                                        • E
                                          earthboy73 last edited by

                                          I'm finding that more and more gay male couples are in an open relationship. I guess it's just to easy to see who else is out there
                                          with all of the different website and apps out there to meet other people. Most male animals in nature will have sex with as many others as they can. They law of survival of the fittest and all. Humans really aren't any different. A lot of it is about self-control and the willingness to make things work and have open communication. I am currently in a monogamous relationship and we both want it to stay that way. We don't play with others, we trust each other not to cheat, and have conversations about our feelings.

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