Crush on a guy a work… :(
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So i've had a crush on this guy for 2 years now. He only works in the summer. He is tall, smart, latin and muscular :cheesy2: and even goes to the same college i go to (i rarely see them there). I don't even know if he is gay. My friend's keep bugging me to flirt with him but i don't know how :blownose:. Every year we got closer and closer, exchanging emails and texts you know, non-sexual. This summer i decided that when they returned to work, i was going to ignore them, you know because it's all in my head. It worked out a little bit, I saw them and I didn't get all nervous or anything :cheers:.
But soon after he spotted me and struck up a conversation. I felt so naked, like everyone around me could see that i liked them. You can't blame me for feeling naked because normally im fun and jovial but when they come around i melt. I can hardly talk. I just want to kiss them so bad. We have been getting closer. We talk about our dreams and they even email me tips on ideas. Help me my bros…. :cry2: :cry2: -
It's really tough to have a crush on someone when you don't know if they're gay or not (hell, it's hard enough even if they ARE gay!!!). On top of that its a work situation? That could easily get messy if you aren't careful! But you have to make a move in one of two directions - a play toward him, or a play to get over the crush. By doing one or the other, you'll get unstuck.
If you want to have a chance with him, you'd have to first know if he's gay or not. In your chats, you'll have to get up the courage to ask him/listen for clues about his personal life. Nothing too invasive, but enough to find the answers you need. The easiest and most common is just to ask if he has a girlfriend (at an appropriate time! Not randomly!!)
If you actually know he's not into guys, you'll have an easier time getting over the crush.It's all about keeping yourself from pining away for your crush/holding a torch. Don't think about it as who you think they are or want them to be. Once you give up on the IDEA of them and focus on who they really are 100%, you can be around them more easily. It will take some time for you to stop seeing them in that way. If you know it's all in your head, then do things to make yourself not focus on him. You shouldn't avoid him, but try to see him as he really is. If you two are friendly, try to find that answer that you may not really want to hear (he's str8, already taken, not interested, etc.) Those things help you to distance yourself from an imaginary romantic ideal.
Hope that helps a little–I know this sort of situation sucks!!! :hug2:
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Thank you Runewell :love: I saw him today and of course he was looking handsome and he said hi and smiled. I guess you are right. The more I know about the real him (gay or str8) i can figure it out. And even if he is gay… the next question will be: Is he gay for me? Lol Sigh, crushes lol.
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Ah yes…it's definitely a nice feeling to crush on someone
But first things first–find out if he likes guys or not. If so, then you at least have a chance! -
Well, I can somehow relate to your story. It is a nice feeling to be in love. I used to go to this coffee shop and there was this good looking barista. We often talked, but yeah nothing sexual. However, I don't know how to explain it but whenever he looked into my eyes, I can sense something different. When we are together, I can somehow feel it that he has some feelings for me. But I couldn't really tell if this is accurate or not. I am also afraid of telling him how I really feel about him.
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Speaking of that situation, even if he says he is married or he has a girlfriend, I have had married men flirt or … before.
Vad beträffar den situation, även om han säger att han är gift eller han har en flickvän, gifta män har flirtade med mig ... -
Thank you Runewell :love: I saw him today and of course he was looking handsome and he said hi and smiled. I guess you are right. The more I know about the real him (gay or str8) i can figure it out. And even if he is gay… the next question will be: Is he gay for me? Lol Sigh, crushes lol.
Any news to give us? did you talk to him again?
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If you want to have a chance with him, you'd have to first know if he's gay or not. In your chats, you'll have to get up the courage to ask him/listen for clues about his personal life. Nothing too invasive, but enough to find the answers you need. The easiest and most common is just to ask if he has a girlfriend (at an appropriate time! Not randomly!!)
If you actually know he's not into guys, you'll have an easier time getting over the crush.My 5 cents… rather than asking if he has a girlfriend (if he is unsure where you are coming from, or not out to all, he might say yes) I prefer asking (did it recently with a neighbor I had a bit of a crush on) if they have a partner, or, if possible, ask if they have a girlfriend or boyfriend (kind of with an open mind, without necessarily implying anything specific). My neighbor was indeed gay... so my next step was to invite him to kind of a social situation, again, not pressing... in my case, he was not too interested
sniff.
Best of lucks!!!
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Dude, just leave it.. No love or crush in your workplace. I had that and it affected my work a lot… Almost got fired, and influence your future career
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Get a couple beers in him
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I have this but various coworkers at my worplace are sooo hot, nice beard trend here, but i am more careful as i don't want to be fired as that happened to me before. I had a crush on a coworker and he discovered it and they fired me, he told me this of the bibile and going to hell.
Now on this job i am more careful with that, i am more shy because i want to success where i work to be able to emigrate to germany and marry my partner
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Be honest to him and tell him how you feel. You own it to yourself and to him.
There is a great chance that you will be lucky and start a wonderful relationship with him (and i truly wish it for you).
Otherwise, if he rejects you then you can start fresh with someone else.
Do not make the same mistake i did and hide your feelings because you probably going to spend the rest of your life wondering what might happen if…. -
If everyone already knows you have a crush on him, can't you ask one of them to ask? ;D
