Context:
I've hooked up with this straight guy several times (both of us early thirties, I've been gay since my teens). He contacted me on this dating app but he's really unsure of where he stands.
Last time we were supposed to meet, he told me he wanted us to stop seeing each other because he was freaking out. Turns out he started seeing a girl and really doesn't know where he stands. However 4 hours after telling me that, he invited me over and we hooked up.
The sex is great and just being with him is amazing. Additionally, he admitted that there was something special.
YSK, he still refuses to give me his phone number and he freaked when after he had invited me over and made me wait 5 hours before canceling on me I dropped in unannounced (I was drunk and wanted to tell him off - though, he still let me in and we had sex).
He's gone for two weeks visiting his parents. He promised we would see each other when he got back.
I yearn for him. I would just like to talk to him (I can still contact him through the dating app). Deep down I know he would enjoy it too. But I'm afraid I might freak him out even more.