Hey guys,

I have a question I've been thinking about putting out there for awhile. It is health related, but I decided to post here because I think it has more to do with my mental state and my relationship than an actual health concern.

Here's some background: A number of years ago I had a particularly aggressive BF who fucked me so many times one day that I developed a small tear, which turned into an anal fissure. Let me tell you, the following month was miserable. I completely recovered and didn't have anal sex for several months following the event, out of fear. Moving forward, I luckily got over that  issue and have had a healthy sexual relationship with my current BF for a number of months now. Our cycle varies, but he fucks me roughly every day or every other day. He always tops.

My question has to do with LUBE - my BF tries to avoid lube at all costs (he says it ruins the sensation for him). Before intercourse I generally blow my BF and then he'll rim me sometimes, then we go at it, just using the spit that has built up. We've been doing it this way, without lube, for months now without any major complications so far. However, in the back of my mind I am concerned that I'm making a mistake and that I might get hurt again. I don't know if this is just some mental issue I need to work through or if it is actually just common sense telling me that I should start insisting that we use lube. I brought it up a few times and he seems to dismiss it, saying that so long as we use a lot of spit and I tell him if it starts hurting then we'll be fine.

So long as I am not actually hurt it should be fine, right?

-A nervous bottom