Confused Feelings
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Well I am here posting a topic as I really don't know what to do anymore.I been going out with a guy for almost 3yrs & something is missing from the very start.
We don't have the passion for each other at all as I thought we would have.He is a wonderful person to be around but I don't see a flame at all even happening.
I have a problem understanding him as he is audistic and I just don't understand his needs,from what he says.He doesn't like when people touch him,he says he is always right & the other person is always wrong.I feel like I am being used for what I have,when I say that I mean like money as he always gets me to spend my money on things around here.I do have strong feelings for this guy but I am really confused at this point.We have an place together & I am at the point where I just want it to end & I go my way & he goes his way.He is lucky as he has his family to turn to as they live down the street from where we live,my family is around 3hours away in Montreal.I don't have a car to pack up my stuff and leave with it all.I just don't know anymore what to do as when I try to talk with him,he walks away from me.I just don't know what to do at this point of my life.:afr2:
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You already know what you want and need to do.
Of course it's going to be difficult. There's the obvious guilt of leaving him due to the autism, but you can't let that hold you back from doing what you know is the right thing to do. Sadness over ending relationships tend to be quick to get over, especially in situations like yours where you know there's no future in the relationship.
Be strong and don't let anyone bully you into staying with him. His autism is not an anchor around your neck.
:hug:
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Oh man. I am really sorry for you. But as the poster above me said, you know what you need to do and you just need to do it sooner than later. Take your time, but don't make it too long.
Literally this past weekend I have come to the realization that I have a history of falling for mildly autistic people (2 people so far, 4 years total time) and who have similar behavior as your guy. I need to stop doing that and look for someone where I can make it work like a relationship. There may not be as much fire in those relationships, but it is more sound.
So, be strong and do the right thing.
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:Hiya2: my Canadian Buddy :Hiya2:
There is some good advice here for you currently. Why don't you PM me and we can work out a way to chat in private about this situation. You have always PM'd me with Site issues so you know I will be there for you in this situation as well. :lovp:
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The 5 commonest causes for a breakup of a gay relationship, or the end of it are:
1.DISTRUST
2.CONFLICT OF PERSONALITY
3.DISRESPECT
4.JEALOUSY
5.MONEY MATTERS.
Yours would be (2), (3) and (5). You are NORMAL personality but your BF has an autistic personality. He is disrespectful of you by walking away when you talk to him. Finally, he is a CHEAPSKATE, stingy.
Conclusion : Just DUMP him for a better man. There are many fishes in the huge ocean. No need to cry over spilled milk.
BEST WISHES TO YOU FOR A BETTER LOVE LIFE IN THE FUTURE. -
You just do what makes YOU happy, which in this case is leaving him.
You are being materially used, and you are not emotionally happy. I am sorry he has autism, BUT it is not your fault nor your own problem! He should be taken care by specialists. Well if you could and you were happy, it is not a problem, but you are NOT!
Packing things back home is not a big deal if you think of saving your soul from more damage! -
No one really knows what you are going through. Remember it's not his fault that he is autistic, not to guilt yourself into staying, but to leave him the best way you know. No one should judge you for it. He is lucky to have you the last 3 years. Good Luck
