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    Do you have sometimes feeling ….?

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    • C
      Commander88 last edited by

      Do you have sometimes feeling that no matter what you do its never enough? I am 27 now, I am almost 9 years single and without sex. I am not in tough with my family over 10 years. I wasn't able to finish shool because I had no money, a few times I end up on the street and no one cared.

      Almost 3 years ago I moved to east europe and I was volunteer there at hostel, I got a terrible bed above the reception (so no privacy, no quite), and I was working 14 days 7 days a week, for 525 days and I was getting paid 10 euros per whole shift, but at least I could sleep… sometimes.
      After almost 2 years I saved enough money to move to a different country where I wanted to finish school, but during my first days I fell of the bike, I almost died there, but at the end I had just several times broken cheekbone , than I managed to drown my brand new laptop (it never happen to me before), and I was out of money again.

      Only luck was, that I find a job here pretty quickly and thanks to that I survived, but once again its at hostel, night shift, I have to be awake all night (but this time only 8-10 hours), but its really terrible, because I have do laundry (washing and ironing) all night, so its really sucks and noone else doing it.

      From work I go directly back home and in reaming free time I am trying to study and do websites but income from websites its never enough to survive with that, but I still have a naive hope that one day it would be enough ....

      I am not nice enough to have a boyfriend or friends, I dont see any reason why someone would want to be my friend. Plus I how I said, who the *** cares? Its not easy to find even friends, since you have no start point and I can hardly ask random people on the street to be friends with me.

      Sorry, I am going to be 28 in a few days so I am super depressed, plus I have 6 night shifts in row to go.

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      • ArmaRayo
        ArmaRayo last edited by

        go to a bath house?

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        • R
          rlynnc last edited by

          As said above if you are more wanting the sex / instant company.  As for meeting people…  I somewhat understand.  I'm a very awkward guy, slightly off personality that people often don't take the time to get to know before realizing I'm actually very decent.  Not social, no club kid, not fond of bars.  I have better luck making friends with plants  :cheesy2:

          My advice...  come to peace with who you are.  You will still have days where you feel down and that is ok.  You will need to force yourself out of where you feel comfortable and get out of your own safe space.  Break your routine (if you can be awake for part of a day off).  Go for coffee, smile at people and at life in general.  Show people you are welcoming and warm, even if they are not.

          Pacific Northwest, Gamer, pot smoker. PS4 Minecraft Survival with Achievements Online world?

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          • ArmaRayo
            ArmaRayo last edited by

            Babies (human) smile about 400 times a day.

            Smiling has health benefits.

            Yet I feel so sad those smiling babies grow up to a fake smile society. Some people hardly smile once a week.

            –-------

            Hmm I think it could be possible to find nice friend(s) from such as bath houses, but that's not really why ppl go there - but it could happen.

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            • gaypraha2
              gaypraha2 last edited by

              Hmm I think it could be possible to find nice friend(s) from such as bath houses, but that's not really why ppl go there - but it could happen.

              It does I can testify. I met a group of twinks there when I was one myself and new kid in town.
              How did I proceed you might ask .. well I was just waiting for some random guy and they were in front of me talking. one of them was cute so I was staring and listening till one of them asked me who/where I'm from and so we became friend.

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              • R
                rlynnc last edited by

                @ArmaRayo:

                Babies (human) smile about 400 times a day.

                Smiling has health benefits.

                Yet I feel so sad those smiling babies grow up to a fake smile society. Some people hardly smile once a week.

                –-------

                Hmm I think it could be possible to find nice friend(s) from such as bath houses, but that's not really why ppl go there - but it could happen.

                I agree ArmaRayo, for all your points.   I've known people to go to baths more for a cum and go, but you never know where a friend or more can come from.   Life is a very strange place.

                Pacific Northwest, Gamer, pot smoker. PS4 Minecraft Survival with Achievements Online world?

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                • ArmaRayo
                  ArmaRayo last edited by

                  Yeah, one can only plan so little 🙂

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                  • C
                    Commander88 last edited by

                    Well, first of all I did not want to say that I want to make from myself a bitch. I know its hard to believe but I am okay without sex, I could hardly survive 8+ years without sex if I would needed so desperately that I would go to a bath house.

                    My point was that only chance to find a friends would be between gay people because at least we would have something in common, but once again people on Grinder looking for a sex, not for a friends, especially if you are not damn hot (than they would at least pretend friendship for a whole and this relationship wouldn't have any progress than it would be over, soon or later.

                    Gay guys cant be friends, because only reason why they are meeting other guys is you want to get laid.

                    Plus I live in a small town so there is no bath house.

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                    • ArmaRayo
                      ArmaRayo last edited by

                      Not even a swimming hall? What country u in? In small towns it can be very hard to connect with likeminds, especially if not lived there from childhood/teens. Homosexuality connects ppl but bringing together is different. A relationship is on shaky grounds if sex is only or mostly the thing that binds you.

                      Looks are just surface, in longer run it's personality that matters + it helps if one goes to gym, jogs or similar.

                      Whether a dating app/site, bars, saunas, woods, hobbies, workplace,, you put urself out there on the field.

                      For sure most everybody wants they're "first time" be special, therefor I totally understand you.

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                      • gaypraha2
                        gaypraha2 last edited by

                        Gay guys cant be friends, because only reason why they are meeting other guys is you want to get laid.

                        Not totally true, I never had sex with the twinks I befriended from the bath house so..

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                        • ArmaRayo
                          ArmaRayo last edited by

                          Gay guy friendship can be troublesome (and is) if they 'compete' about same guy(s). You wouldn't want your friend(s) to use your friendship to ruin from u ur hot new date.

                          Luckily there are many gay men who aren't interested of such, but enjoys gay friends in such as hobbies outside of 'gay scenes' for example.

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                          • C
                            Commander88 last edited by

                            @ArmaRayo:

                            Not even a swimming hall? What country u in? In small towns it can be very hard to connect with likeminds, especially if not lived there from childhood/teens. Homosexuality connects ppl but bringing together is different. A relationship is on shaky grounds if sex is only or mostly the thing that binds you.

                            Looks are just surface, in longer run it's personality that matters + it helps if one goes to gym, jogs or similar.

                            Whether a dating app/site, bars, saunas, woods, hobbies, workplace,, you put urself out there on the field.

                            For sure most everybody wants they're "first time" be special, therefor I totally understand you.

                            I live in a small city, well not that small but still small. Anyway its one of the most depressive cities in the UK and its famous for high number of suicides. Fabulous right?

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                            • C
                              Commander88 last edited by

                              @gaypraha2:

                              Gay guys cant be friends, because only reason why they are meeting other guys is you want to get laid.

                              Not totally true, I never had sex with the twinks I befriended from the bath house so..

                              Wait a second… you are from Prague?

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                              • gaypraha2
                                gaypraha2 last edited by

                                I was living there when I created this account.

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                                • C
                                  Commander88 last edited by

                                  I see. I lived there 6 years.

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                                  • Rudric
                                    Rudric last edited by

                                    UK is "such" a small country.. Could you travel to bigger cities?

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                                    • C
                                      Commander88 last edited by

                                      Not really, because biggest City here is Cardiff and I dont really like Cardiff that much. I cant move out from Wales because I would have to pay 3x times higher tuition

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                                      • Dremric
                                        Dremric last edited by

                                        Not that this might mean anything, but make friends with girls. They usually know of some gay people. Most of my girl friends know plenty of gay men. I met some of my best gay friends through girls.

                                        Just be you, show your smile, be creative. people are attracted to positive energy. There is a saying that goes something like, "Laugh and the world laughs with you, cry and you cry along". It is a crap saying but it is so true to me. Even though you are down and depressed, find a hobby, or do something active. The more you become phyiscally active the better you will feel. Find something that makes you feel good.

                                        Work on YOU first. Dont give up because this moment will change for you.

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                                        • K
                                          kenjysn1 last edited by

                                          Hello Commander88, A wise man said "When Heaven is about to place a great responsibility on a great man, it always first frustrates his spirit and will, exhausts his muscles and bones, exposes him to starvation and poverty, harasses him by troubles and setbacks so as to stimulate his spirit, toughen his nature and enhance his abilities. " 2000 years ago.

                                          I have similar situation like you several years before, I leave my family for college study and never comeback. I'm lucky I can pay my tuition by part time job and scholarship. I meet my partner there, and live together for more than 10 years. We have same longterm  goal for the future. So study hard in college and work hard now, bcos we are in our plan for the tomorrow. Life is not easy, a positive attitude may lead you to better life.

                                          About make friend, I'd say honest is the key. I have 2 best friend for more than 20 years. they're not gay, but that's not a problem. sex plays a minor part of role in my life. We can swimming naked in the river, or Wrestling just half naked. bcos we were used to doing that, just a man to man playing. all of them have been married and have children, I'm a godfather of one of their child….

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                                          • gaypraha2
                                            gaypraha2 last edited by

                                            Just be you, show your smile, be creative.

                                            Or one can get neuroleptics and antidepressant  ;D

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