Can you love sex with men butnot love men?
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I dont know if it is just myself but can anyone here say that they like sex with men and not fall in love with men?
I love fooling around with men but i would never let another guy take me up my ass. i would fuck a guy up the ass and cum though
Can anyone tell me if they have the same feelings?!?
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When I lived in Key West, there was a guy {Vidal} who claimed not to be gay because he never kisses men. Of course he was a total dick pig bottom and dressed like a $3 female whore.
Anyway, it sounds like you have some issues regarding your self image of masculinity. What you described is quite common in latin men. They'll have sex with every man on the planet, but would kill anyone who dared think of them as gay.
Loving a man does not make you a flamer, who calls the electrician in to change the light bulb. My partner and I do a lot of our own car repairs and home DIY and we are both crap at flower arranging.
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i dont mean it in the way of denying your true sexuallity.
i just mean in the simple way that i love to fool around with guys but just dont see a future with a guy. where as i can get married settle down with a girlfriend have children. I know alot of these options are open for gay people as in civil partnership and adoption and so on.i think its just more my point of view or what i can see myself with in the future.
strange i know but …..
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so what you are saying is..that you feel/think/whatever..that you can only be happy if you are in love/married to a woman?
that is the brainwashing of society dude..LOL
I personally do not believe in Love..or atleast the Love that most people talk about…I think its just a fantasy..something set up by society/religion/whatever..that you are supposed to find on person..a soulmate..
I have want most people would say fuckbuddies..3 of them..I care for them..they are a big part of my life..am i in love with any of them NO...do i love them..Yes...
do I see myself with just one person..at this point in my life..NO..
but i personally do not see myself every having that type of relationship with a man or woman...monogomy to me is just a lie..another thing with that happily ever after crap..LOL
i think we are a bit brainwashed..with finding the ONE...to many kids stories tell us that..to many movies tell us that...but in the real world..nothing even close..and if so..very few in between...but whatever...
but with sex..yes i'm a top...and no I do not like to bottom...not because is less masculine..I've had my numbers of masculine guys..that just love to bottom..i just don't like it...I do give a wicked blowjob..and kissing is not an issue...LOL
love to rim and get rimmed...so anal play is not refused..but full anal penetration..i just do not dig it...tried it once..did not like it...
and NO not because it hurt..it just did not do anything for me...
but if you where to be with a woman? will you be on the DL...or will you be monogamist with her?...if so..will you really be happy...giving up something that big...wanting sex with men..its not just going to go away...no matter how butch a chick may be she will never be a man...
this brings my issues with so called bisexuals...and my issue with monogamy...
anyways...adios for now...
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I think society has something to do with it, I kinda almost felt the same way till I fell in love with a guy, and i was openminded enough to let that happen. I'd been in love with women before. I enjoy being bi. The guy writing above me says something similar but is just wrong; if you are bi you are no more likely to miss sex with guys if you settle down with a woman than vice versa. I have had serious relationships with both and been completely a) open about my bisexuality and b) content with experiencing sex only with this person. Sexuality does not start and stop at genitals and I think I know my own sexuality better than people who have not explored sex with both genders. The 'no matter how butch the chick is' comment is just condescending.
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ak1986 you may be secure…but not all...
we have to be realistic..like it or not.. a big percentage of people cheat...both gay or straight and yes even bi...
why?...the ones i ask...its cause of the conquest..or not getting what they want at home...so maybe you are the exception of the rule...and just because you say it does not mean its true...
most people want to be faithful... ::) ::) ::)..but more than most can't...
I've been around enough bisexuals..to have a feel for it..most ot them cheat..and yes lie about it... especially if they decided to be with a person of the opposite sex..for the long run..they end up lying to them..
you are faithfull..you are honest good for you....but lets be realistic...not everyone has self control like you...
so no the butch comment was not condescending was just an example....
sex is not just about genitals..true...but its very important in any relationship...if there is no sex in a relationship you are just loving roomates..calling it a relationship...if there is something missing in sex..you end up unhappy...either way..its important...
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What is difficult here is the relative lack of openly bisexual people. Most people I know who are sexually adventurous would or have had sex with both genders, but they choose a side, and they choose to identify themselves as either straight or gay cause it's a lot easier with stereotypes about bisexual guys (not so much girls) like those ones. I am not an exception. Sex is very important I agree, but sex is not just about genitals is what I'm saying. I don't think they define or even have a big say in one's sexuality. The gender divide is mostly fictitious and societal. There are a lot more bisexual people than openly bisexual people, believe me. If a guy can live as straight then it's easier. If a guy can live as gay in some ways that's easier too. If the guy who posted the original message did fall in love with a guy and settle down, by your logic, why wouldn't he go out and cheat because he would be craving sex with a girl? You seem to be talkin about very specific types of bisexuals. I hate the word bisexual. Why would anyone choose never to experience sex with a gender, and thus cut off the people they are attracted to by 50%? Other than them being uncomfortable about words like queer and bisexual?
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I do not believe that is the scenario for all bisexuals…
but the ones i've encounter...which has been plenty...make me feel this way...and yes for the OP...if he fall in love with in man..sexually he will be missing something..whether or not the relationship will be enough to subside that whats he will be missing..depends on him...right?
but i have to say that bi seems easier for some than gay...
i've heard it enough time for other gays..that at first they came out as bisexuals..cause it seemed more acceptable...from friends and family...giving the hope that they might still be able to have a family with someone from the oppostie sex...
I do not have a problem with bisexual in general...but the ones i've met...and i know its not all the bisexuals in the world..do not give the best examples of monogamy..but i do not believe in monogamy either....
I just hate the dishonesty....I'm not bi...totally gay here..and very comfortable about it...but i do not beleive in having a one on one relationship..open relationships is a plus for me.....but i'm honest about it...when i meet someone new...
most peeps would not be...all categories...and that is my issue...many want monogamy but most do not know what that really is...
and i think that is the issue the OP has...he thinks men can have a relationship...with many anyways...but maybe is that he can't have a relationship with men...society pushed that so well...only hetero relationships work...
which in reality....its not so true..they just portrait it as it if does work..lies are just a wonderful thing...
but as i said i do not care if you are gay...straight or bi...just be honest with yourself and others..and it will be fine...
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I know what you're saying. I think there are a lot of people who find it easier to come out as bi then slip into a gay lifestyle. I also think that some of these people are bi, they just ultimately find it easier being gay. I am completely honest with myself when it comes to sexuality, and I never gave anyone the idea that I'd settle down with a woman or anything; heck I walk about with a bag that says 'BAN MARRIAGE' on it. I think what I'm trying to say here is that I wish more bi guys were honest with themselves. I can understand why they wouldn't be, cause I've had just as much shit about my sexuality, or probably more, from gay guys than straight ones. I'm happy to identify myself as queer, as long as it doesn't stop me sleeping with ladies if I so wish. I agree completely with your final sentiment.
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and i totally agree with yours…I do not have that much of a problem with bisexual..LOL..
but the ones i've encounter..did not do the group good...I don't care who you have sex with..just be honest about it...thats all..to yourself..and to those who you do get involved..sexually..romantically...etc..
but even tho i'm gay does not mean i get all of it..LOL..i was watching this show yesterday or whenever...about this guy..transgender...but he/she is stilla attractive to women and women only..making may thing..ok so you want to be a lesbian...and fine i don't get it..but its all good...
what pissed me off..its that his maried to a woman and has a kid...unfair to both of them...he should have been honest before..she is still with him..but having issues..can't blame her...she cares for him/her...but she wonders does this makes me a lesbian..was it the sex/gender that made her stay or the person...so i get what you mean...mostly...and its all good..
its good to know a bi guy..that its comfortable with who he is..even if its over the internet...
be who you want to be..but be honest about it..if and when in a relationship...its not fair fot he other person having to deal with such issues..if not given a choice...that is my big hangup i have with anyone in the closet or partially in the closet...you want to deal with your crazy issues...solve them before you get a second person in your life..not easy to do...but its the best thing to do...
anyways..good topic...later...
Derek
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Hello
ok i know for shure that i can love sex with women but not love women. I am 100% gay and i can love only man. this is maybe dificulty to understand but i make diference between sex and love. Sex is for me only pleasure and i admit that if is it with man that i love is better then with man or women that i don't love but still is pleasure that I very like and love. Love a man or the women is something else then love a sex with man or women. -
1. I think you should visit bi-sexual support & information sites - you will find that the development for bis is particular to bi people and very different to gay people. The question you pose is typical of bi-sexual development and their framework is very different to gay people. For example a common solution for bi-aware people is to prioritse their relationshhips within the framework of a 'primary' and 'secondary' partner. Bis have to live with the difficult condition of needing to emotionally invest in two different genders. They have different solutions to their own bi-specific problems.
2. You use the expression 'fall in love'. Falling in love is an elusive term. Love itself, the fundamentals of entrusting oneself to another - for many many people this is very difficult and even those who partner may never feel this all the time.
Love can be written about in volumes - it's complexities and depths, it's interpretation -if it exists, what it is , what it isnt…..you seem to expect it from your circumstance or as a defining presence of the time you choose to settle down. But that may not be the case.
When the time comes for you to partner, there may be many factors that force the issue of settling down into your life, and falling in love may not come into it. You may grow into love through familiarity - love is about life - it s 'big' - it doesnt always 'arrive' - it might take years for you/anyone to recognise it's presence in your/their world - to understand what it is as a value - who it reaches out to - and how you choose to express it -
I don't think any conversation about loving, love or being in love should be mixed up with establishing who one is comfortable having sex with and in what way or extent that sex occurs. Love is something else.
I would say your responsibility to yourself is to be honest about your sexual orientations first and then seek out information from the appropriiate sources to help you to continue to grow and establish your own unique finger print. In that way when loves manifests , you will be able to treat it with respect without any self deceit, conflict, or betrayal occuring in the relationship.
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I love fooling around with men but i would never let another guy take me up my ass.
There's certainly nothing wrong about not bottoming if you don't want to – god knows we bottoms can use all the tops we can get -- but saying you'll never do it means you're going to miss out on meeting your prostate and having some great anal orgasms, however you choose to self identify.
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I love sex with men and have dated both men and women, but I really couldn't see myself settling down or having a long term relationship with a guy.
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I love sex with men and have dated both men and women, but I really couldn't see myself settling down or having a long term relationship with a guy.
Why?!
Do you feel that gay relationships are inferior?
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I believe this can be the case.
I know a few straight men who enjoy the experience of having sex with a man (having a penis in their ass), and yet they would never kiss a guy and they still want a girlfriend, have kids, etc.
It seems like a lot of people are just curious about the actual feelings of it, and why else would we have a g-spot in our ass if we weren't meant to explore the feelings we can get from using it.
So, I think you can love sex with men, but not have to be in love with men…
but that's the not the case with homosexual men, of course.
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but then that brings up the case also of men who do love men and are ga but just hide behind the whole i love having sex with men and not love or have the life style.
I love sex with men. i dont like anything in my ass - i could not love a man . i see them as atractive and they turn me on.
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personally, i would say YES! you can have sex any guys without loving anyone.
maybe, your still in "LUST" period! but time will come this will change.
i was like that but i found myself my beautiful, loving, sweet BF!
he's the only guy fucked me! and loving it!
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but then that brings up the case also of men who do love men and are ga but just hide behind the whole i love having sex with men and not love or have the life style.
I love sex with men. i dont like anything in my ass - i could not love a man . i see them as atractive and they turn me on.
No offence, but you just seem like a slut. Not everyone is like that.
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ok first, gay relationships (even marriage) is not inferior to staight relationship. In fact, gays couples are more stable than straight couples… why? because between two gay guys, they know what's going on, they know they are both sluts, and they are ok with it (i'm talking about younger couples). Older, more mature gay couples, they are very serious ans very monogamic (except for open-relationship). I know many gays couples like that.
Straight couples... not even let me start with them... All i will say is that they are crapier then gays couples most of the time.second, Loving a man is so much fullfilling, and so intense... so pure. I'm in love myself and let me tell u that it makes me feel alive, even thought he is in belgium and i'm here in the fuckin united states...
My straight best friends (a girl) agrees with me, and some other straight guys i know agree that gay love is sometimes more honest than straight love (go figure ???).