Anyone else feel extremely guitly about their fetish?
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I'm experiencing post nut clarity right now and I feel kinda angry at myself.
So I have a MAJOR str8 fetish and domination,submission fetish. I love watching porn where a gay dude boss around a str8 dude to do gay stuff.
Anyway, I discovered PumpingMuscles videos courtesy of that one uploader who always edits them down and just show the highlights. If you know PM vids they're softcore and I'm kinda left wanting more hardcore stuff.
I looked up "photographer and model" porn on Google. I saw an article about a photographer being sued by a model. The model told the story graphically, about how he was forced to have an erection so he would fill out the underwear, the photographer constantly adjusting his underwear until finally pulling it down altogether and ordering the model to jerk off and ejaculate on the photographer's face which the model did.
Reading it made me real horny and I jerked off imagining the whole situation and now I'm here hating myself , feeling guilty that I popped one off to a victim recounting his sexual assault...
Feeling like major creep right now, Luckily, my university exams are coming up this month and hopefully take my mind away from all of that.
Sorry for all this rambling, I just needed to get this one out of my chest
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You did the right thing by sharing your experience. Telling other people about things always helps. Perhaps you already feel some well-earned relief.
It's hard to know what really happened between the photographer and the model. I've been on both sides of the lens in the modeling business (never famous!), and it can take unexpected turns. I could tell lots of strange stories, but I'll save those for another time. It seems that the photographer definitely had sexual designs on the model. But was the model forced into what he was doing? Being asked to model in underwear was a hint that more might come. The model might be just having "seller's remorse" after everything was over.
There are lots of scenes in porn that we enjoy in the moment, but have concern about later. I sometimes enjoy "hidden camera" scenes where guys are showering or wanking in the toilet, unaware that they're being filmed. There is indeed something "wrong" about that, but I still often enjoy it.
I don't think you need to feel like a creep. We'll never know the full story here, so I suggest just taking it as a porn fantasy that you enjoyed. You mentioned your exams coming up--best of luck on those, and if you get to stressed, just give yourself a hand
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I agree with both of you. I don't know where I stand on this issue. It's not black or white. Sometimes, not frequently though, when I watch fetish porn like BDSM, considering your age and how much you consume it, you realize that every mainstream fetish porn you watch is vanilla and I sometimes wish I could watch something much more hardcore and less staged; border-line forced etc. But after I cum, I think to myself how "disgusting" I am for fantasizing about this.
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Don't worry. It's just a stage. First you deny it. Than you accept it. Than you feel guilty. Than you enjoy it. We've all been there but some eventually not everyone gets to the entire progression some people get stuck at different phases.
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it's good that you are aware, we all have crazy toughts sometimes
