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    Some friends are bad

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    • K
      kako75015 last edited by

      How to cope with toxic friends ? They are good friends, but always putting you down  because of your sexuality.

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      • andergarcia
        andergarcia last edited by

        They are not really your friends. Just kick them off and "expel" them from your life as soon as possible.

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        • A
          Adverse last edited by

          Agree - get rid of them. They are not your friends, start looking to expand your circle and leave these behind. Although it might seem difficult now, you'll be glad you did it.

          Why are you hanging around with people who put you down?

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          • S
            scratcher71 last edited by

            If you're trapped in a toxic friendship/group of friends, leave fast, because you'll start to act like them.

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            • T
              TopperBr last edited by

              I ended two friendships a couple of years ago because of this. One was a friend (female) from university, who got into the habit of always asking me VERY intimate things to which I had, at no time, allowed her to talk about. Even worse, she got into that gay stereotypical thing - so that, everytime she would text me and I would answer only later (because, God forbid, I could be watching a movie, working out, eating), she would return like "what were you doing, naughty boy? tell me everything!". I got fed up with such attitude.

              The other one was a guy I met through Manhunt. He seemed to be a nice guy, but had certain "creeds" towards gay behaviours that weren't same as mine, but he would never even consider talking about it - he was always right, I was wrong, even though I had been going out with men more than a decade before him (he was married to a woman, then divorced…). At some point I also got tired of not being able to talk about certain stuff because I knew I'd be preached. Then it was over.

              And I must say: I miss nothing about both of them. Nothing.

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              • andergarcia
                andergarcia last edited by

                I was in a very toxic friendship/group of friends last year… it took me time to notice how toxic they were, but another group of friends warned me of them and I finally admitted that they were right and broke up the friendship relationship.

                I cannot feel happier than now.

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                • S
                  simon92 last edited by

                  I don't think its so black and white; and it's hard to just cut people out of your life, especially when they don't actually know what they're doing is wrong. If you're comfortable with talking to them about it, that's what you should do first. Educate them?

                  If not then go make some new friends, hang out with your old ones less and less. You'll find a friendship group who will appreciate you 🙂

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                  • S
                    scratcher71 last edited by

                    Another problem, is that they'll start bad mouthing you behind your back, aka=gossiping. Even I started doing the same thing :blink: it was that toxic.

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                    • F
                      fezobe last edited by

                      Was such a friend myself, being a whiny and obnoxious jerk. Sadly, most of it I understand only in retrospect, after my straight friend of 10 years finally kicked me.
                      And now I'm a lonely and miserable jerk.

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                      • T
                        trinibiguy @fezobe last edited by

                        @fezobe me too i am deaf.

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                        • S
                          semurg30 last edited by

                          I'm a bad friend and I tend to attract bad friends.

                          If I care about them they don't care about me and vice versa.

                          I feel like when I make the effort to be a real friend I get taken advantage of. So most of my friendships tend to be superficial.

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                          • L
                            lololulu19 @kako75015 last edited by

                            @kako75015 I have found that the vast majority of "friends" will betray you very easily.

                            at the moment, I can't think of anybody I trust. I am working on one.

                            If someone even has ONE person they can trust in their lives.. that is one more than most people have.

                            I certainly do not trust any of my family members, nor neighbors, nor co-workers.

                            I might trust RaphJD.. but he lives thousands of miles away. I am hoping to have one I can trust 150 miles away.. and perhaps even closer.

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