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    What counts as 'being out'?

    Coming Out
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    • Z
      zebrapenis last edited by

      I am always confused re: what counts as being out. There's a guy I knew via work for 2 years before I saw his facebook relationship status about coupling with a guy. I had no idea he was gay, but he had been out, and it just never came up. In my own case, most of my friends know, but I haven't come out to family and a few colleagues, and don't discuss it on social media. Similarly there are others who haven't told many people, but won't lie if asked about it.

      So, what would you say 'being out' comprises of?

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      • T
        torrhuz last edited by

        My impression of "being out" is that the person is completely comfortable in their sexuality and is open enough to admit to their sexuality when asked in an appropriate (and safe) social situation. They are also out to at least their immediate family.

        If I use myself as an example, I'd say I'm out. My parents know and all my friends know. However, I don't go out of the way to share my sexuality because its not exactly something you just throw out into conversation. When people talk about who they're attracted to or such topics that is where I freely state my interests. Unless of course someone in this group stated they have strong feelings against homosexuals, in which case I keep my silence because even if I like who I am there is no sense in inviting an idiot to start harassing me.

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        • Z
          zebrapenis last edited by

          So the surrounding factors and social attitudes to homosexuality also count. Thanks!

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          • B
            boiboiboiboi last edited by

            Yeah, being out in my opinion is simply being openly gay, while being comfortable with who you are.

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            • E
              eroshermes last edited by

              I think it means whatever it means for you to be comfortable being gay.

              I'd consider myself as "out", as in, whoever asks me I won't deny or lie about it. But I don't walk around wearing a sign and tattoo it on my forehead if you know what I mean.

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