Should I or shouldnt I
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I wonder if i can ever come out. If i do, i really wish everyone would find it ok and still act the same way like now.
I know its impossible especially in a very asian culture and religious community that im living in.
is there anyone out there having a similar or same problem like i do? -
I use to look at it the same way as you are, I was very hesitant to come out, and didn't until I was 19 for fear of losing all of my friends. I was bullied all through high school and I was afraid to lose the few friends that I had. I ended up finally getting the courage to tell all of my friends, and I look at it as one of the best choices that I have ever made. I finally realized that if people didn't like me for who I really am then they really never were my friend to begin with. I always wonder how different my life would have been if I would have just came out when I was still in school. It was really hard and kind of scary at first, but I have found over time that people are more accepting if they know about it from the beginning. There are always going to be people that do not like us, but I am pretty good at knowing who to stay away from and refuse to hide the real me from anyone. I am ultimately living a much happier and better life than I ever did before I came out. This is just my experience and opinion, you ultimately have to do what feels right for you, but I hope that me sharing this helps you in some way
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I use to look at it the same way as you are, I was very hesitant to come out, and didn't until I was 19 for fear of losing all of my friends. I was bullied all through high school and I was afraid to lose the few friends that I had. I ended up finally getting the courage to tell all of my friends, and I look at it as one of the best choices that I have ever made. I finally realized that if people didn't like me for who I really am then they really never were my friend to begin with. I always wonder how different my life would have been if I would have just came out when I was still in school. It was really hard and kind of scary at first, but I have found over time that people are more accepting if they know about it from the beginning. There are always going to be people that do not like us, but I am pretty good at knowing who to stay away from and refuse to hide the real me from anyone. I am ultimately living a much happier and better life than I ever did before I came out. This is just my experience and opinion, you ultimately have to do what feels right for you, but I hope that me sharing this helps you in some way
thanks for the sharing~ greatly appreciated
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No problem, I'm actually kind of surprised that no one else has posted anything else yet, but either way you go, I hope that you are happy with your decision, it is a really hard choice to make, and I wish you nothing but the best
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So assuming the environment in Australia is not so much different than here in Canada where I live. Urban centers are easier environments and generally have more diversity support networks. My parents are Christian Lebanese immigrants, but are not heavy on the religion.
Here are a few things to consider:
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Do you live at home with family?
I would recommend to wait until you move out, just makes it a lot easier to deal with them, like hanging up the phone and not being kicked out. -
Are you financially independent from your parents?
Some parents try to coerce their children by cutting education funding, kicking them out, making your home too poisonous to live in, etc. -
Are you in a relationship?
Yes -> Is this someone you are sure you want to be with for a long time, then wait until you are sure.
No -> This might be the easier one because they can't blame someone else for "making you gay", gives your future partners a fairer chance.
Also doesn't mean you have to come out to everyone. Is it really that important for some people to know before others or can they wait.
But keep in mind its not a secret if you're not the only person who knows. -
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I waited until I was away from home and financially independent before I came out and I'm in the United States. Have you told anyone?
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If I could share a similar story/give advice on your specific situation, I would. Fortunately, I can only give advice on what I have seen and heard from other people who have had….repressive...environments...Not having first hand knowledge, my advice would be to attempt and find some outlet - some area where you can speak - possibly a therapist (where you have confidentiality and won't have to be worried about being outed before you are ready and able to come out without repercussion). At least with that outlet you can get some of the issues off of your chest that might be bottling up and release some of the inner tension. I would hope that being able to speak freely could ease your personal feelings and the therapist might be able to provide some strategies for dealing with the stress I'm assuming would come from not being able to be yourself, in addition to possibly helping you find a way to come out or advice on the right time to do so.
Most people would suggest that you get in touch with some of the LBGT groups and centers around you...however, if you do so....you may be outed unintentionally (hence why i'm suggesting a confidential setting).
Good luck and feel free to message me if you want to talk
