This is a 'chicken and egg' situation.
Do you approach friends and if you think them responsive get them to spank you or do you find other spankers and if you bond with them develop deeper friendships?

If you are the intuitive type of outgoing person then the former is easy for you. Its safe but runs the risk of alienating old friends and can explode very publicly if handled badly.
However, if you are shy, retiring and a little nervous then the later is much easier. I have responded to blogs, chats and ads where chatting beforehand with a total anonymous stranger is very easy.Just use your common sense that you would use for any anonymous meeting.  I never allow myself to be tied-up, always agree the severity of the spanking and try and meet in a public location before going to a private or secluded position. If the guy wants sex, for me thats an Ok, but you can always lay down the ground rules even before you meet.

The best suggestion is to make your own clip and post it on the Members section.
I check regularly for new Members postings and judging by the number of seeders its well viewed.
Put a little thought into its production. If its obviously a quick wank in the toilets then its not going to be remembered by many and will soon fall off the end of the table. Something a little unusal, even kinky goes down fine. Perhaps dressing for the part or some interesting sextoys. Use your imagination. Show what your prepared to do. If all you can do is stand there and wank off you wont make much impression.
Most amateur clips fall down technically for lack of lighting. The light needs to be behind the camera and shining towards the subject. You dont need professional gear but a 40 watt table lamp isnt going to do much for you. Try and get another guy to film for you. No matter what you do if the camera is in a fixed position it cannot compensate for you moving around and you will soon move out of frame.

good luck and hope to see some postings of you.

Some interesting views here, I may as well add my 2 ha'pence worth.
When I last used a communal locker room I remember seeing a guy there who having showered and dried hiself then started dressing himself. Have you noticed how most guys get their underpants on first? well this guy put his socks and shoes on then a t-shirt that covered only to his waist. He spent ages fiddling with his watch strap whilst constantly moving around and thereby displaying his rather large dick to all present. Not only did he not mind being seen but clearly invited it by his actions. The sad truth is that the majority of men do not possess a dick big enough for their expectations and avoid open display if it can discreetly be done.

When I first went to a naturist beach in France, I walked off the 'textile' beach into the nudist part. With some hesitation I took off my beach shorts, carried them and walked amogst similar men, some of whom were probably gay but certainly not all. I did not feel uncomfortable because we were all in the same boat! and that I think is the crux of this.I suddenly realised that the stallions I had seen in porn movies are the exception not the rule.