Logic
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Two redneck farmers, Jim and Bob, are sitting at their favorite bar, having a beer.
Jim turns to Bob and says “You know, I’m tired of going through life without an education. I think I’ll go to the community college, and sign up for some classes.”
Bob thinks that’s a good idea, and the two leave.
The next day, Jim goes down to the college and meets the Dean of Admissions, who signs him up for the four basic classes: Math, English, History, and Logic.
“Logic”, Jim says, “What’s that?”
The Dean says “I’ll give you an example. Do you own a weed-eater?”
“Yeah”, says Jim.
Dean says “Then, logically speaking, because you own a weed-eater, I think you would have a yard.”
Jim says, “That’s true, I do have a yard.”
“I’m not done”, says the Dean. “Because you have a yard, I think, logically, you would have a house.”
Jim says, “Yes, I do have a house.”
The Dean says, “And because you have a house, I think, logically, you might have a family.”
“Yes”, Jim says. “I have a family.”
“I’m not done yet”, the Dean says. “Because you have a family, then, logically, you must have a wife, so logic tells me you must be a heterosexual.”
Jim says “I am a heterosexual. That’s amazing - you were able to find out all of that because I have a weed-eater!”
Excited to take the class now, Jim shakes the Dean’s hand and leaves to go meet Bob at the bar.
He tells Bob about the classes he signed up for: Math, English, History, and Logic.
“Logic”, says Bob. “What’s that?”
Jim says, “I’ll give you an example. Do you have a weed-eater?”
Bob says “No.”
Jim says, “Then you’re a queer.”