DANGER: new viruses discovered!
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Turner Virus : When you attempt to play any sound file, it pops up a warning window stating that some lyrics may be unsuitable for children.
Government Ecomomist Virus : Nothing works, but all your diagnostic software says everything is fine.
New World Order Virus : Probably harmless, but it makes a lot of people really mad just thinking about it.
Capewell Commission Virus : Won't allow you to open your files for 75 years.
Boss Virus : Makes your screen go completely white.
National Front Virus : Shifts all your output to the extreme right of your screen.
Texas Virus : Makes sure it's bigger than any other file.
Adam And Eve Virus : Takes a couple of bytes out of your Apple.
Edgars Virus : Constantly tries to prove it's virility by attaching itself to younger or newer files.
Airline Virus : You're in Dallas, but your data is in Singapore.
Freudian Virus : Your computer becomes obsessed with marrying its own motherboard.
Tec Virus : Your PC stops what it's doing every few minutes to ask for money.
Jimmy Hoffa Virus : Nobody can find it.
Townsend Virus : Helps your computer shut down whenever it wants to.
Healthcare Virus : Tests your system for a day, finds nothing wrong, and sends a you a bill for $2,500.
Walsall Police Station Virus : It claims it feels threatened by the other files on your PC and erases them in "self-defence".
Edmonds Virus : When you save a file, it prints, "I am saved!" to the screen.
Michael Jackson Virus : Hard to identify because it is constantly altering its appearance. This Virus won't harm your PC, but it will wreck your car.
And finally…
Chamber Virus : poses as a harmless list of funny computer Virus names! Is quickly passed from one user to all other users known via e-mail, consequently consuming all known network resources.