Irish Joke for St. Paddy's Day
-
An Irishman named O'Malley went to his doctor after a long illness.
The doctor, after a lengthy examination, sighed and looked O'Malley in
the eye and said, "I've some bad news for you. You have cancer, and it
can't be cured. You'd best put your affairs in order." O'Malley was
shocked and saddened. But, being of solid character, he managed to
compose himself and walk from the doctor's office into the waiting
room.To his son who had been waiting, O'Malley said, "Well son, we Irish
celebrate when things are good, and we celebrate when things don't go
so well. In this case, things aren't so well. I have cancer. Let's
head for the pub and have a few pints."After 3 or 4 pints, the two were feeling a little less somber. There
were some laughs and more beers. They were eventually approached by
some of O'Malley's old friends who asked what the two were celebrating.
O'Malley told them that the Irish celebrate the good and the bad. He
went on to tell them that they were drinking to his impending end. He
told his friends, "I have been diagnosed with AIDS."The friends gave O'Malley their condolences, and they had a couple more
beers. After his friends left, O'Malley's son leaned over and whispered
his confusion. "Dad, I thought you said that you were dying from
cancer? You just told your friends that you were dying from AIDS!O'Malley said, "I don't want any of them sleeping with your mother
after I'm gone." -
lol - didn't see that one coming. Was trying to figure out the ending as I read…
-
My Boyfriend recently told me this Irish joke:
Three men walk into a bar; an American, an Englishman, and an Irishman.
They each order a pint of ale.
The American reaches for his glass and sees a fly in it. Without hesitation, he flicks the fly out of his glass, and drinks without a second thought.
The Englishman grabs his glass and finds a fly in his ale also. Very carefully he pulls out his handkerchief and lays it neatly on the bar. He gently plucks the fly from the glass and places it on the hankie. He then folds the hankie back up neatly, and places back into his pocket, then drinks his ale.
The Irishman looks in his glass, and finds a fly in his beer also. Engraged, he plunges his fist into the glass to grab the fly. Clenching the fly in his fist, he shouts "Spit it up you Bloody Little Thief!" -
-
:laugh:
-
