An Englishman is walking down the Irish countryside
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An Englishman is walking down the Irish countryside and stops at a river to take a drink. He cups a hand and gets some water. Just as he is about to drink a shepherd yells to him in a thick Irish accent, "Don't drink out the river, it's full of sheep pee!"
The Englishman replies, "I don't understand a word you are saying. I'm English. What'd you say?"
The shepherd replies, "Use both hands, you'll get more that way."