Bad Question Good Answer
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These are things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and now published by court reporters who had the torment of staying calm while these exchanges were actually taking place.
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Q: Are you sexually active?
A: No, I just lie there.====
Q: What is your date of birth?
A: July fifteenth.
Q: What year?
A: Every year.====
Q: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?
A: Gucci sweats and Reeboks.====
Q: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?
A: Yes.
Q: And in what ways does it affect your memory?
A: I forget.
Q: You forget. Can you give us an example of something that you’ve forgotten?====
Q: What was the first thing your husband said to you when he woke up that morning?
A: He said, “Where am I, Cathy?”
Q: And why did that upset you?
A: My name is Susan.====
Q: Do you know if your daughter has ever been involved in voodoo or the occult?
A: We both do.
Q: Voodoo?
A: We do.
Q: You do?
A: Yes, voodoo.====
Q: Now doctor, isn’t it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn’t know about it until the next morning?
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Q: The youngest son, the twenty-year old, how old is he?
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Q: Were you present when your picture was taken?
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Q: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th?
A: Yes.
Q: And what were you doing at that time?====
Q: She had three children, right?
A: Yes.
Q: How many were boys?
A: None.
Q: Were there any girls?====
Q: How was your first marriage terminated?
A: By death.
Q: And by whose death was it terminated?====
Q: Can you describe the individual?
A: He was about medium height and had a beard.
Q: Was this a male, or a female?====
Q: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition notice which I sent to your attorney?
A: No, this is how I dress when I go to work.====
Q: Doctor, how many autopsies have you performed on dead people?
A: All my autopsies are performed on dead people.====
Q: All your responses must be oral, OK? What school did you go to?
A: Oral.====
Q: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?
A: The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m.
Q: And Mr.. Dennington was dead at the time?
A: No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing an autopsy.====
Q: Are you qualified to give a urine sample?
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Q: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?
A: No.
Q: Did you check for blood pressure?
A: No.
Q: Did you check for breathing?
A: No.
Q: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?
A: No.
Q: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
A: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
Q: But could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?
A: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practising law somewhere. -
not sure whether to laugh or cry :crazy2: lol
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Made my Day. Thanks :hehe:
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:hehe: :hehe: :hehe: :hehe:
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That made me laugh on a wet, dark morning
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Oh my…. Those are freaking hilarious!
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hahahah.. :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :haha: :haha: :haha:
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Funny stuff :rotfl:
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It is hard to believe some of them are true, but then read the series "The Darwin Awards". It is truly amazing how stupid some people are.
Now I have a true story -
Back when I was 18 or 19, I was delivering business machines and picking up others to take to the shop for repairs. Company policy was to never take (detachable) cords for several different reasons. So I had this calculator and I was waiting for a signature on the paperwork. This guy was sitting on the desktop, perhaps it was lunchtime and he was relaxing, I dont' know. Anyway he was swinging the cord in a circle, just for something to do and he was going to put the female (live) end in his mouth. I said "you know that is still plugged in…" He dropped it and said 'Uh, I wasn't going to put it in my mouth." He would have of course if I hadn't said something, but I always wondered what would have happened if he had. A nasty burn for sure, I wonder if it would have killed him?