Dead Poets
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This English landlady had a couple of struggling poets for tenants.
When the poor fellows got behind in their rent, and the landlady was unable to have them evicted. Instead, she decided to murder them.
She baked a large scone and put some poison in it, then invited the poets down for tea. She served each of the chaps a cup of tea and half the scone. The poison worked as advertised, but of course crime does not pay, and the awful woman was soon arrested.
Feigning innocence, she demanded to know with what she was being charged.
The police inspector replied: "Well, it seems, madam, that you have killed two bards with one scone!"